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Kathleen Doody

Updated: Wed, 10 Dec 2008 10:40 pm

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Run my own Business in the Education sector but first and foremost I'am a Poet and Writer. Have had poems published by United Press Ltd. Currently looking to showcase a select collection of my poetry and writing online. Compiling a collection of short stories for my upcoming book and hoping to self publish in the near future. I was born and raised in England but I now live in County Limerick,Ireland.


MY HEAVEN I walk through the garden of heaven, with the trees, shrubs and the exotic plants with beautiful red blooms, I feel the serenity within there souls and smell the scent of their delightful perfumes, As I walk through the garden I try not to step on the fragile flowers under my feet, I see the delicate flowers drop there heads as there petals droop with the heat, They're exhausted from the summer sun, they need a refreshing drink, I look over at a daisy and it look as if it gave me a wink, The garden's rich with vigour, colour and grace, I take a closer look at a Pansy, under my magnifying glass, it has a round, sweet, face, I stop and rest a while on a bench and I take a sip of my cool lemonade The colourful array of bedding plants look like there to dry I think they need to be moved into the shade, I hear a Lonely, blue, forget-me-not cry out don't forget me, In this garden of heaven everyone can be wild and free, I gaze up at the tree's above me for what time seems like several days, The red poppies dance under the maple tree, the sticky sap runs down a branch, The orange blossom, smells sublime, it's citrus scent makes me feel like i've travelled afar, I'm at peace as I walk, a roaring noise interrupts my peace, in the distance I can hear a passing car, Then as quick as the car arrived it goes away, Just then I spot a woodpecker tapping at a birch tree, his beak ricochet off the branch and the whole tree shakes, For a brief moment I could of been anywhere , I could of been in Paradise, In heaven, But then my mobile buzzes as I receive a text message from a good friend of mine from Devon, I awake from my daydream, to discover I have been in my garden the whole time, I guess my garden is my haven, my private paradise, and that suits me fine.

All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.

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winston plowes

Thu 11th Dec 2008 12:16

Hi Kathleen,

Welcome to Write out loud. we are here to "Encourage participation in Poetry" and in writing some feedback to your recent postings I hope I am doing this. Your Daydream Poem - I could see myself reding this to my daughter when she was little in a nursery rhyme style. I think she would enjoy the rabbits / toddler / dog / daisies / fox etc. and it would round off the day nicely with a positive attitude to the next new day. 2 comments - 1) Writing in this simple style for children I think has to stick to a really rigid meter. Some of your lines don't fit into the same rhythmn. 2) You best and possibly most severe critics will be the children themselves. So why not ask some of the age you are aiming at what they think of it and also some older children how they think that they could make it better. I once tried this and got the reply " Dad, I don't understand it all and its way too long and too horrible. Its not like proper story. (And that was Ted Hughes). Anyway, Well done for posting up your poems. Put something in the blog section and it will get more comments. Don't take criticism too personally and leave some constructive comments for others. I was asked recently, "Winston why is it that all your poems dark and grim"? I like grim sometimes.
All the best winston

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Chris Dawson

Thu 11th Dec 2008 10:06

Hi Kathleen,
I’ve been asked if I would read your work and leave you some feedback, I’m not exactly sure that I’m qualified to do so, but I shall do my best.
I think it is true to say that all of us who blog on here love language, and feel we might have something different to say about the things that have had some impact on us, and I think the amount of feedback given goes some way in telling us how much, or little, of what we’ve said has struck a chord in others.
For my own part, I started watching this site and reading other people’s work quite some time before I plucked up the courage to post here – so well done for having that courage. I do think it takes nerve to lay your work open to criticism from complete strangers.
It seems to me that you are very observant of the world around you, and are keen to share those observations in verse form. I notice you write exclusively in rhyming couplets – or perhaps it’s just coincidence that those you’ve posted here are all in this form? I appreciate that some of your work is, in fact, written for children, but it does add to the childlike quality – which is fine if that is your intention.
I think metre is very important - I found the lines in ‘Leaves’ to be very long; it might help to read your work out loud – just to get a feel for the rhythm – a great example of a good performance beat, accessible to children, is Benjamin Zephaniah’s ‘Talking Turkeys’.
The best advice I could give to any writer – experienced or aspiring – is read! Read other writer’s work, experiment with form and language, and just ... keep doing it over & over. There are lots of excellent writers on here, I have found them very welcoming – explore their work & notice the differences between them. But most of all, keep writing, keep posting!
Hope this is of some help,

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