System error
(music: "One side of me" - Sebastian Zawadzki)
Do you get sold on others
trying to pitch liberation
in a moment of ecstasy
portrayed
as bliss
when knowing not
what choice is
do you get sold on yourself
trying to pitch serfhood
in a moment of ecstasy
forgotten too soon
when remembering is
what loss can not express
an emptiness
constructing meaning
...Sunday 19th March 2023 2:16 pm
Rictus
(music: "Return 2" - Max Richter)
Fear -
that something called out in front of you
the day before the day
you called yourself desperate
in trying
to find
the voice
for all the silent screams
you gave away in front of mirrors
since you never cry alone
and you will always be there
for yourself
the perfect reflection
of a rictus
one only you have seen on...
Thursday 16th March 2023 6:09 pm
Missed call
(music: "Dream 1" - Max Richter)
If there is anything I ask of you
its silence
one understanding absence of intention
and maybe two more thoughts you’d keep
for a future not ours
just one question there forever longing
which we both buried
in the joys of chords stricken
by the emergence
of a nothingness
so complex in its antithesis of what two could be
we'd cr...
Tuesday 14th March 2023 7:19 pm
Walking dead
(music: "Small measure of peace" - Hans Zimmer)
Uncertainty of pain
Is this what you call boredom?
A nagging
circling
feeling
of being there for no one
but being
A banality of existence paused wilfully?
Is this how you call life controlled?
All that you can allow yourself to act on –
a decreation of your "I" –
accepting death
preathumously
in summoni...
Tuesday 14th March 2023 6:41 pm
Expected
(music: "Together we will live forever" - Clint Mansell)
Night falls like your words
So expected
Devoid
A mystery unveiling fears of being just another shadow
Uncast
in an alchemic mix
of the purportedly eternal
blindness.
Embrace me like a dream
So expected
Detached
A hope unveiling mysteries of being
Or just another page turned
in your calendar ...
Monday 13th March 2023 8:29 pm
Betrayal
(music: "Hold this place" - Alice In Winter)
A feeling so withhold
Just passing
Or not
Returning
In circles repeated
Soo many times
You forgot it’s a wheel
One that drives you into that nowhere you can't see
Cause it drives you
A driver blind
But not as much as you feel
A something you know too well
For custom, it turned out in that space of yours
Where al...
Saturday 11th March 2023 6:16 pm
One for another
(music: "Internal Flight" - Estas Tonne)
Following all sought for
You let go
Of pain
As you do the grip of a chord
Mastering agony as just another song
In rhythms of backward clocks
You let go of the moments
leaping into your old pond
of tears uncried
letting someone listen
to the sound
of pain
unsought
leaving behind stillness
emersed in yearning sear...
Saturday 11th March 2023 5:50 pm
The choice
(music: "Dream 3"- Max Richter)
How shall I empty
This present full of tears behold
One carried along
For too long
Torn sideways by delusion and pain
One too full
Of senseless searches
for meaning and justice
cause pain cannot be felt
Alone
Just like beauty cannot be felt
Together
And death cannot be accepted
By anyone who shared
Them both.
Dea...
Friday 10th March 2023 9:22 pm
Sonnet to absence
(music: "Absence" - by Juliano)
Believe
That nothingness will hold you
And cherish you
Like no one ever could or would
will let you be
everything a random choice would ever deem to be
Just nothing
Just present
Earning
To continue
Without pretence
For all the other
Without despise
For all the other
In an all-encompassing being of being
Squared to the capacity
Of uncertainties ...
Friday 10th March 2023 9:19 pm
Lossless
(music: "How did it happen"- Tom Holding)
Don’t let me go
Away in singlehood unfounded
For I trusted too long
A single word
So pointed in its centredness
It's lost
in all the vanity of averageness
Unrecognized
To the most simple of the truths
For I know
In hopes ungrounded
That that away
too lost in misted lows
Is just an absence of tomorrow
A loss...
Friday 10th March 2023 9:16 pm
Mishoped
(music "Interstellar" - by Hans Zimmer)
One word won't let the sadness of your silence
slip by another time
just whisper closely once again through breaths skipped one after another
that nothing can be easy if not tried
you move in steps not taken
dreamt through instants merged into those others
in wishes bold but also thoroughly controlled
or not
maybe just raged out in...
Friday 10th March 2023 9:12 pm
Untitled 5
(music: "A model of the universe" - by Jóhann Jóhannsson)
What do you think you understand of pain
When you can understand it?
Not when your mind bounces in leaps towards the hells of hell
in nothingness
but understanding how you got there?
Seeing the path to nowhere
Freefalling
While desperately trying to cling to any reminder of just being human
But failing
And tr...
Friday 10th March 2023 9:01 pm
Untitled 4
(music: "A model of the universe" - by Johan Johansson)
A blank page is full in its modesty of unreflection
Emptiness though meant to be grasped
Is just an error lost to transition
To the observer of time
To the onlooker of dust
To the catcher of thoughts
Forgotten in absence
Mistaken in loss
Present in a being so flawless
Just the mad ones can feel it
Yet unshakab...
Friday 10th March 2023 8:56 pm
The one
(music - "I giorni" - by Ludovico Einaudi)
You woke up to a wind of thought whispers
Alone
awake for hope
The one you don’t believe in
But feel
The one you fight
But cannot overcome
The one you hate
As much as you love
And as much as you love yourself
The one you envy the most
The one minding the one
The one oneing
Around oblivion
Around others
Tha...
Friday 10th March 2023 8:52 pm
The classic
(written while listening to "Air on the G string"- by J.S. Bach)
Lead me to beauty
On drops of tears cried for aeons
Towards creation absoluted from the sin of perfection
An art subtly brute
Alive
Cracked from the pressures of being
Enduring change in instants of frailty
Perfected to human
Tuned to the abyss
Of atrocities too quickly forgotten
It's not about beaut...
Friday 10th March 2023 8:41 pm
Galatea
(written while listening to "Una Mattina"- by Ludovico Einaudi)
Just forget me, cause you already did
by inventing me the moment you saw me
Not that face of solid stone cut rigidity
But those eyes
Glancing at you
Uncovering the darkness in your moves
Too realistically hollow
Embracing your well-accepted disappointment
In being
Glancing through others at your own mind
...Friday 10th March 2023 8:38 pm
The vow
(written under "Dream 3 (in the midst of my life) - by Max Richter)
You are my blind sacrifice
A love never happened
A love never to be
A single no, to save your yeses
from vanishing inside my empty future
A single no, for the day not to come
The one when you meet my enamoured gaze
Melting in the swarm of shadowy delusions
The one when I meet my apex
And fall into c...
Friday 10th March 2023 8:34 pm
The name
(music: "So far, so close"- by Olafur Arnalds)
Just tell me a word
so I can write down forever
the name of the rose
that one, plane and hypnotic,
swinging in your mind
from lobe to lobe
like the millionth elephant
swinging in other people’s cobwebs of trust.
Just tell me to go
and never return
cause I will anchor back
and you know it too well;
and don't trust your cobweb
of ...
Friday 10th March 2023 8:29 pm
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