Poetry Blog by Fred Varden

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Fred Varden on Sonetto Romantico (Sun, 24 Mar 2019 05:39 pm)

Brian Maryon on Sonetto Romantico (Sun, 24 Mar 2019 08:05 am)

Fred Varden on Doorstep Beauty (Sat, 2 Mar 2019 10:39 am)

Kate G on Doorstep Beauty (Sun, 17 Feb 2019 05:41 am)

jennifer Malden on Sat Navigation (Sun, 3 Feb 2019 03:21 pm)

Fred Varden on I’m a footie fan! (Sun, 3 Feb 2019 10:48 am)

M.C. Newberry on I’m a footie fan! (Sat, 2 Feb 2019 04:01 pm)

Fred Varden on CONFUSION OF MIND (Sun, 13 Jan 2019 07:15 pm)

poemagraphic on CONFUSION OF MIND (Sun, 13 Jan 2019 01:23 pm)

Fred Varden on CONFUSION OF MIND (Sun, 13 Jan 2019 11:19 am)

It would have happened anyway

Remember the time you forgot your lines
In that play you were in at the village hall
The crowd got angry and chucked pork pies
In the air, on the ceiling and up the walls
It would have happened anyway

We went out on a date and we got back late
You suggested a coffee to round things off
But I explained that I’d got a lot on me plate
You took it the wrong way and binned me off
It would ha...

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Recipe for Disaster?

Remember to double check all ingredients

Take everything with a pinch of salt

However it turns out, it’s never your fault

Just stick to the recipe and be obedient 

Ensure the work area is clean and dry

Then decide whether you grill or fry

If at first there’s no success then just try


Firstly take a person on face value

Sprinkle with trust and a little TLC

Add hope, d...

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Build the Wall!

Another day at Trump Towers, whatever Donald does,

he comes up smelling of flowers

Because he’s the head of a major world power

Build the wall!


Some say he’s had a serious makeover

As hairstyles go it’s a huge combover,

now Is he white or is he foreign?

Maybe the future’s bright,

and the futures orange?

Build the wall!


Trump’s had meetings with Kim Yong- Un


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Memories worth Forgetting

Memories are made of this?
You must be joking stop taking the mick
They say that little things mean a lot
But you say in my case, definitely not

Remember that day when we first met
In the bookies when you were ‘avin a bet
One place short of an each way double 
When your nag pulled up with bladder trouble
The others all raced down the home straight, 
By the time yours had a pee it was fa...

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Sonetto Romantico

Orange grove fragrances dominate my senses

Seville’s humid heat almost overpowers

Landscape appears through tangerine lenses

Revealing meadow adorned with multiple flowers 


Alcazar de Sevilla with courtyard and towers

Is where we met, albeit by pure chance

In a single fleeting second, seeming like hours

We immediately recognised instant romance


Unadulterated passi...

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Between a Rock, the Devil and the deep blue sea

A rock, a hard place, an impossible choice
A voice of reason or one of despair?
The stark realisation that you have no voice
As you concede defeat on a road to nowhere.

Around in circles your thoughts and feelings
The pro’s and cons continually revisited
Over and over, back and forth, looking for solutions but with options limited.

Between the Devil and the deep blue sea
A rock and a h...

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Driving Miss Maisie

Mirror, signal, manoeuvre

Make sure you have the appropriate shoes on

Ease off the clutch when your ready to go

It’s not a race but don’t go too slow,

or they’ll fail you for not keeping

up with the flow.


It’s called not making normal progress you see

You can even overtake a car or three,

provided you take due care and attention

Not everything in the Highway Code


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What’s more Important?

What’s more important than ambience

and mood, at a point where your about

to eat gourmet food?

What’s more confusing than legal jargon

When you’re trying to increase that profit margin?


The red tape and rules are surely for fools

In this day and age,

where like minded people

are on the same page,

and those that are not, just don’t give a jot

about what is importa...

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I fell in love with a Senior Citizen

I fell in love with an older woman

Well when I say old, I mean, older than me

Now I know what you’re thinking,

that can’t possibly be,

but that’s where you’re wrong 

cos she’s a hundred and three


Ok, so what’s the attraction?

Money or looks?

Her experience and intelligence?

You’re all on tenterhooks,

‘cos you want me to give you all ‘t gory bits,

and your conv...

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🎵Oh battery hen, oh battery hen

Oh when will you be free again?

Let’s stick a human in the cage

and watch him cry and shout with rage


Yes watch him cry and shout with rage

How does he like being in a cage?


Oh battery hen, oh battery hen

let’s make you all free range again🎵🎵

The Urban Poet 2019

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Questions and Answers

Is the answer to the question acceptable?

Does the question deserve an answer?

If I ask you to be honest will you hear me out?

Or is it going to be distractions, deflections?


There’s a pattern emerging here, that fills my heart

with fears, doubts, what’s this all about?

Answer the questions, don’t counter with another question,

it gives me verbal indigestion 



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Pierre de Paris

Pierre de Paris acted wild and free

so much so, that it resembled a show

when he turned up in town, causing

ladies to cry, and their siblings to frown


With cane in hand and moustache finely honed,

he cut quite a dash in those pinstriped

clothes, suits, blazers and jacket with tie

It was like mix and match, apple meets pie


An eye for the ladies Pierre did have 


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Doorstep Beauty

Broadleaved woodland spreads alongside

open meadow, wetland and arable farmland

Cereal and vegetable, thriving in abundance, 

in this gem to the eye of the beholder.


They are sheltered by their taller friends:

Oak and poplar

Cherry and birch

Rowan, Willow, Larch and Pine

I wish these were all friends of mine

Conifer, Hemlock

Sycamore and Maple

Standing tall li...

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They talk often of life’s own cross roads

when it becomes that time you need to unload

Problems, situations, mistakes and more

You may have done things differently

that’s for sure.

If it hadn’t been for obstacles in the way

Another life you may have had today

But hey, we are we are, and it’s a fact

Is what you tell yourself, it’s all part of the act

In convincing yoursel...

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Loss of balance feeling sick

Wondering if I’ll get over it

Room spinning, severe attack

Can’t make out where anything’s at

Loss of balance, can this be real?

It’s like living inside a Ferris wheel

that speeds up and then slows down

Leaves my system whirring around

My head, my brain, my thoughts a blur

What’s happening to me? it’s getting worse 

People think that I’ve ...

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Sat Navigation

You need me on every journey
To show you the way you should go
Without my expert direction
An A to Z you would have to follow
Navigation, I’m Sat navigation

My voice can be changed in an instant
I can be whoever you want
A man who is very assertive
Or a girl with sweet dulcet tones

For drivers I’ve solved all their problems 
No need to ever get lost
unless you’ve not updated my syst...

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I’m a footie fan!

I’m a man, I’m a man

I’m a football fan

everything else you can keep

Football’s what I eat and drink

No need for any sleep

That’s only wasting precious time

For me to tweet about that team of mine

Or watch ‘em on the box with a beer

Don’t ask macho me to drink any wine


I’m very sporting, win, lose or draw

It don’t matter to me if I bust someone’s jaw

In a figh...

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I knew it wouldn’t happen!

It came we saw
We waited with open jaw
How it could it change
our lives for bad or good?
When division prevented 
the plan to work
the way that it should?
We voted, the country split
Democracy then ruled over it
Time has passed
still no agreement 
The debate goes on
It’s like bereavement 
As things look dead
In the water that’s true
But in any case...
Does it bother me and you?
I ...

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Parody for the Homeless

(To the tune of ‘Star Man’)

Didn’t understand, I had nowhere to go, oh oh

Out on the streets in the freezing cold oh oh

Every man for himself is golden rule you see


My only shelter was a cardboard box oh yea

The trash my restaurant fending off a fox

and then, I’d lay my head and sleep with one eye open, thinking...


It’s a hard life living on the streets

Some peopl...

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When things are at their lowest point

And life seems harder day by day

When you’re in need of encouragement 

And someone to help you see a way

You don’t expect it to be made worse

Then wonder “hang on am I cursed?”

For trying my best for those I love

Then hating myself for crying out

The Urban Poet 2019

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Where do you belong?

In the big city amongst municipal concrete 

Along a rugged coastline, rocks protruding 

Within a deprived enclave, bereft of tears

No apparent progress for years and years 

Where do you belong?


Breathing clean country air out in the sticks 

Near woodland or forest with healthy walks

In a has-been village where coal was mined

Where in desperation people turn to crime


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On a Knife Edge

Crimes involving knives

Affecting peoples lives

Senseless reasons why

young people sometimes die

At the hand with icy blade

Too late the price is paid


A tragedy avoidable?

An issue or conundrum?

Is knife education working

from Edinburgh to London?

Is this a sign of the times?

Statistics, rising crime?

A social problem?

A youth rebellion?

To reasons we...

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