Poetry Blog by Brian Maryon (2018, Life)
Uncle Seamus
Uncle Seamus was quite infirm
and couldn't get up the stairs
So he lived and slept in the living room
but still managed two affairs
The first with a local widow
who set his heart on fire
the second one more ambitious
with the Malvern Hills Girls Choir
He kept himself quite healthy
though his hygiene wasn't best
just washing round the edges
of his sweat-...
Monday 22nd October 2018 8:45 am
Unhappy Hunting Ground
Here they come in droves,
the humble pot boilers
to worship at the feet
of the traitorous elite
with hair pulled out in clumps
in frustration at those
unable to muster
the inspiration to rise
above the level of lacklustre
Now nowhere to be found,
The Enterprising have packed up their teepees
and headed for a happier hunting ground
Thursday 18th October 2018 8:28 am
Backstabbers
If you're a victim of knife crime in Southwark
you know when you're being attacked,
but across the Thames in Westminster
they'll stab you in the back
Tuesday 16th October 2018 7:14 pm
Man on the Clapham Omnibus
The man on the London Eye said
"this is what you wanted,
just pick the choice you want to make,
we're keen to know your views,
we'll tell you which to choose"
The man on the Clapham omnibus
had nothing much to lose.
He thought it through carefully
before he made his choice,
grateful to be given voice
The London Eye man was annoyed
and urged him to think a...
Monday 8th October 2018 11:52 pm
Gandhi
I'm watching Gandhi on telly
as there isn't much else to do
I'm finding it very enjoyable,
I can't wait for Gandhi 2
Friday 5th October 2018 4:22 pm
Feeling Peckish?
Cod and prawns
in a white wine and
crème fraîche sauce
with leeks and fennel
Simmer for ten minutes
Serve with ciabatta bread
Thursday 4th October 2018 7:33 pm
He
He sang of pleasure and regret
and a girl whose face
he may not be able to forget,
but it's him we remember today,
and if there is a heaven he'll be there
singing and dancing
in the old-fashioned way
Monday 1st October 2018 5:25 pm
Fàilte....not
At a place near us called Smite
there's an Irish gypsy site
Avoid the place by day
and stay well away at night
cos just for the craic, out of you,
they'll kick the fecking shite
Friday 28th September 2018 12:13 am
TOM 6325
The flight back was uneventful
We took off on time,
there was nothing to do
so I made up this rhyme
The flight food was unappealing
I just had a cup of tea
It cost two pounds ten
but only worth 20p
Always a queue for the loo
so I gave it a miss
then at Bristol Airport
I had a long piss
We waited forever for our cases
The belt broke down
so w...
Thursday 27th September 2018 11:34 am
Sun Lounger Trouble
My wife became fused to her lounger
after using excessive lotion
I considered just leaving her there
but had to forget this notion
when I remembered she had our safe key
secreted in her bikini
and had to get Maintenance
to come and cut her free
The ordeal left her quite distressed
She walked as if in a daze
but it didn't stop her spending
my euros, at El Corte Ingl...
Tuesday 25th September 2018 4:29 pm
Incidente al Hotel Casa del Mar
My wife says I'm cruel
I feel such a fool
I kicked her towel in
the infinity pool
Monday 24th September 2018 2:07 pm
Cannes? Cannot
Poolside in Santa Ponsa
topping up my tan
The wife won't stop complaining,
she wants to go to Cannes
But Cannes is too expensive
when you're living on a pension
which I explained using two words
I wouldn't care to mention
Thursday 20th September 2018 4:34 pm
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