Poetry Blog by Alexandra Parapadakis
Searching for you
You’re the word
On the tip of my tongue
- tip - tip – tick – tock
You’re the face on my clock
You’re the catch in my breath
Like if I was to cough
Words of you
Would just tumble out
Like if I was to shout
Words of you
Would just rumble out
You’re built into my skull
You’re the clutch over my brain
You’re running through my veins...
Monday 1st July 2019 1:27 pm
What is the scale of reality?
We all have our own truths
Our own views
How do you quantify actuality?
“A fantasy is a vision
It is solely in your vision
It is envisioned by you
A vision is a fantasy”
But saints had visions!
Politicians have visions!
Some people have double vision
Anyone that has sight has vision
Whether they have a sixth sense
Wednesday 19th June 2019 1:28 pm
My mouth took some months to bloom
My words took some weeks to flower
You and I do not speak different languages
We possess different meanings
“What is the curl of your tongue?
What is the grind of your teeth?
What is the bow in your brows?
What do you mean?”
Your bottom line is neat and fine
Your ballpoint pen bullet-proof
My point is a r...
Sunday 9th June 2019 4:07 pm
Her skin can open up like a mouth
It can speak
When it parts
It can extend like a tongue
It can taste
Your arteries are seams
Try to unpeel them
Slip off your flesh
Search your pores
For secret trap doors
Let the inside out
Part it like a mouth
It can speak
Unfold the red carpets
Of rolled and folded tongue
Let it searc...
Sunday 27th January 2019 12:48 pm
I’m a cycle
I’m a circle
I’m a forever
Casting shadows on myself
Packing silver on the shelves
Plus! Plus! Plus! Plus!
Maths was never my forte
You cannot minus or divide me
I’m a forever
Smiling when the moon comes
Smelling for when Monday runs
I was reborn, refreshed
I can be ironed and pressed
Good as new
Friday 17th August 2018 6:59 pm
If I am your world
with my head lying on your chest,
then is the b-beat b-beating tectonic plates?
Is your heart safely caged?
Can I lift my head or will you break?
You are the love between my legs.
You are my love, between my legs.
Are you the birthmark on my flesh?
It beats: s-stay s-stay...
Is your heart safely caged?
Friday 17th August 2018 6:47 pm
I am keeping a secret with myself
clutching it within like a bird’s claw,
the carrier pigeons have been shot,
guess I forgot to warn the men with rifles,
suppose it wasn’t a clay pigeon after all.
My mouth is a gold crested envelope,
my lips are licked with wax:
they are an inked kiss,
the pout is the stamp,
my mind is the scroll:
bound and bound,
Tuesday 10th July 2018 2:23 pm
Minds mould cannot always bend to the will - Look!
A blur of surreal reality:
it’s vivid, a memory, a means
but travel through years
and maybe it’s a dream,
or the worst fear:
(for the youth with infantile stretch marks to hear)
For the youths with flat ironed flesh and barely dogmarked ears,
what we all fear
is to forget.
Tell the boy with the newly ...
Thursday 7th June 2018 3:52 pm
Do you remember how we used to savour the pins and needles on our tongues?
Do you remember how we used to bite into bitterness?
lick the spit of life
I was turned on by brokenness
maybe it’s cliche
that I craved pain
swallowing broken bottles
it's lined my pockets
it's swollen my stomach
Do you remember when we saw ‘sad’ as just another crayon
to colour ourselves in w...
Sunday 1st April 2018 4:06 pm
I think I hung myself in your tears
Yeah, the other day I realised
One noose, one tear drop - same shape.
I choked on the salt of it
eternally thirsty now
When they fell from your eyes
they looked like showers of broken glass
How I wished I could have swallowed that instead
I think that would hurt less
I’ve got 6 bruises, 7 cuts, 3 scars
I’m still counting.
Sunday 11th February 2018 2:21 am
I can’t tell you.
But last night, you entered my chest
for play, some kind of game, like ‘Operation’
and then I couldn’t sleep
I jolted – shivered – jerked – quirked,
now my eyes don’t close
and my body is a pulse,
you tiptoed across my ribcage,
leaving foot prints enlaced by landmines,
you slept on my lungs,
short wired my arteries,
you clipped the circuits of my ...
Wednesday 27th September 2017 2:10 am
My hands are patterned by ambitions,
these lines on my skin are wishes,
palms marked like the sky after a shooting star
and shining when they interlace with your fingers,
your skin's wrinkles and crinkles.
The crevices of our skin do not match or meet
the way coloured paths on a map synchronise and intercross,
We are separate pieces of meat
Monday 31st July 2017 2:40 pm
In the creases of a crumpled T-shirt,
the darkening orbit of an orange pasta stain,
the unhinged playfulness of bright and living eyes…
the golden curls like mazes of cornfields – no way out –
The type you just want to twist around your finger –
I noticed you.
In the unrestrained laughter,
I would recall each word that tumbled from your lips
And hang on them, swing from them,
Tuesday 16th May 2017 1:35 pm
Your skin like the yellow brick road,
and what is it that creates that rush of blush?
I’d love to shovel out your flesh or drill through your cheeks
to reach those autumn leaves,
that grow behind the golden weeds,
the red leaves that were never green.
No, never new, they never grew,
they stayed and they remained:
Dying, but never dead,
thriving, behind your face of ...
Friday 31st March 2017 3:47 pm
We were like ‘yin and yang’,
‘Spick and Span’
- Hot pot, big pan -
slick and tanned!
The could we can -
sweet, sweet like marzipan!
The kind of love that makes you FAT,
that attracts the sniff sniffing rats.
- Rap! Trap! Rat! The blind bats! -
But I walked and you ran,
I was kicked like tin-can
then you thought you were tin-man,
cause you forgot your heart ...
Tuesday 21st February 2017 11:28 am
Eyes and lips
blossom from your carved face,
sugar skull, sherbert fizz.
To Mr, from Mz,
we really wanted to fuck this.
Turned my brain insane,
my tongue inside
Caught in fog,
in haze, like cloudy lemonade;
a gaze, let's misbehave.
I won't make it.
this forever pretence,
can't do more pretend.
Take a hot hit,
bit by bit,
Monday 12th December 2016 4:31 pm
Have you seen her eyes?
Like searching grass stains
Reaching, reaching up the bark
Of her rough touch, rough hands.
Legs like hay, the hairs like needles,
Could lose thoughts in them, do you understand?
Oh, have you seen her eyes?!
Like dancing lily pads,
I once tried to catch them in the lake.
Silly mistake, oh big mistake
Because she can be a swamp,
Her pull like...
Thursday 10th November 2016 5:27 pm
Call me the doormat,
The infestation of rats,
The ‘oh she ain’t all that’,
Call the kettle black!
Call me the diva, the princess, the moan bag,
The emotional one, oh isn’t it sad?
The hot head who can only nag nag nag,
That period trainwreck – a handful for a lad.
Call me whatever deflects most from what reflects
When you stand by the mirror and boast,
Thursday 29th September 2016 3:40 pm
At first love was a pump, a needle,
Eyes wide when your high
...Or see someone you like.
Stifled, we always rivalled
Till no more, the beat became sore
And we spiralled, overdosed,
Hot headed, cold blooded.
Passion became blown out,
The anticlimax of a candle...
Like the heroin ran through her heart,
Like the cocaine contorted her chest,
Like the salvia had shaken ...
Tuesday 20th September 2016 5:18 pm
Her lips were red apples,
“Don’t trust lust!”
They called her a hag
Told me she had driven me mad!
“Kiss me” she said
And then I dropped dead
Because I realised my story was wrong,
Erased the ending they taught belonged
And then all I had to do was admit!
Write into the story and say:
actually everyone I am g-
“She’s sick, she’s just sick!”
“She needs a doc...
Monday 5th September 2016 5:26 pm
Suffocating under the rhythm of your heart beat
Like drowning beneath a sea of thumping marbles.
You are the ball pit, the sand pit, without end – falling!
But who can ever stand when they are - head – over – heels – for someone –
And you pulled me in like a rip tide, a whirl wind, a sinking pool,
Wrapped me up like pig in blanket with your tangled hair
And the salt of it...
Wednesday 17th August 2016 9:21 pm
I’m pretty sure there were tulips in her eyes,
I shouted “Fire! Fire!”,
She took off her sunglasses,
She saw sunrise.
Now I know it, there was a darling rose in her blush,
A honey dew in her stare
But they told me “beware, beware!”
“Have you not been warned of ‘primrose way’?”
Now I felt it, there were dandelions on her lips…
Make a wish, make a wish!
Thursday 4th August 2016 12:32 pm
No way honey!
That answer forever
Cause I can see your heart beating -
Beating out of your chest
When I undress,
Beating out of your chest when I am there.
No way honey,
Cause you’re fresh out the holy water,
Fresh out Mary the mother.
Can’t corrupt the white light, the earths hope, world’s might!
Can’t let you give in, lose course, all in the name of ...
Friday 17th June 2016 9:33 pm
Baby, oh cry "red red" baby!
Red stare, double dare me, baby.
You look angry maybe,
that frown like a red cloak across your gaze
with your silver tongue
words like shining bullets
cutting me down with your mad arms.
What mad, bad arms you have!
What a mad, bad glare you have!
All the better to come swinging at me
with those meaty limbs like axes.
Oh, please baby I'...
Sunday 12th June 2016 2:17 pm
There is a war rallied between our hearts:
some people say love,
other people play love.
But when life becomes a game,
when words can only be spoken by characters,
when breath can only be projected by theatre
then I lose myself...so you lose me....and I risk losing you....
And the curtains fall shut -
And the dice stops rolling -
We lost the bet.
Tuesday 31st May 2016 1:33 am
You pick up the trees and you wave them like fans
But her face continues to sweat.
You unravel the ground and you drain it of soil
But her stomach never rounds,
Her mouth remains open.
You bottle up the ocean till all water is extinct
Yet she continues to faint of thirst.
You take life from the earth,
You remove breath from the world
And she continues to perform still bi...
Saturday 21st May 2016 4:59 pm
I think that I was born on the moon.
But it was never ‘written in the stars’,
I think that when I landed here on earth,
My voice was left behind
Because you can’t hear me.
When I talk,
You can’t hear me,
You look up to God for answers...
And you kiss me like your investigating the saliva for my heritage,
You go inside me like your searching for my identity,
Saturday 21st May 2016 4:40 pm
Lips: like cliché cartoon roses.
But open up my mouth,
Those lilies will - snap. - You. - Up.
Thorn in your side.
I think we used to fly with the bats,
The doves always ended up on our dinner table,
I told you it was chicken.
You choked me with Amen,
You squeezed me with your hand for grace,
For grace, from grace I fell
Down from the heaven...
Tuesday 22nd March 2016 3:05 pm
I think I’m addicted to acting the way,
Behaving the way,
No, I never meant to-
No, I never intended to-
didn’t set out to break your heart
I think that it came naturally to me...
Snapping those heart strings it’s what
It’s what I’ve always done best.
Affection is a weapon they say,
Charm is a murderer they say,
The blood you lose...
Wednesday 9th March 2016 7:54 pm
When you lit that cigarette
The bones of me shuddered,
The blood in me halted.
What I wouldn’t do for you to light my flame with your lips....
Because I’ve had men tell me that my lipstick tastes of petrol,
That my mouth lights fires,
That my tongue causes explosions
And of course, that opening my legs is the best way to put a fire out.
But this fire begins at you...
Sunday 28th February 2016 4:50 pm
Can you see the track marks up her arms?
With my wide eye
The stranger upon her neck.
Like the birthmark of a bloodhound,
Like a grisly flesh pinch,
An angrily sealed wound,
A Chinese burn,
A beating burning bruise,
A bloody blush:
The bite of the hungry.
Teeth she counted like cash,
The molars which paid her fine
And got her Alice's very own wonder
Monday 22nd February 2016 9:13 pm
I’m gonna be so pretty for you,
As one layer falls off and tumbles to the ground -
Hugging your feet
Like a lash of waves.
I’m gonna be so pretty for you,
Let me be pretty for you,
I will be the prettiest I’ve ever been,
As one layer of flesh peels off, along with her clothes.
One layer of soft lips melts from her features -
Layers and layers till...
Sunday 14th February 2016 11:56 am
I got a taste for blood last night.
It wasn’t yours,
It wasn’t his,
It wasn’t hers,
I got a taste for blood last night and it was my own.
Sometimes I consider draining myself dry,
Sucking myself into sand
Come, watch me crumble.
I got a taste for the blood which runs
From my lips.
But nobody ever described self destruction like this,
I never considered I mig...
Thursday 11th February 2016 2:43 am
Someone's sowed pins and needles into her lips.
Thursday 11th February 2016 2:32 am
Peppercorn eyes or was it peppermint eyes, does it matter?
Something...orginal eyes! Something blazing eyes...something dreamy and crapper.
Yes, so he tasted of morning breath and the blandness of saliva
but just write that he tasted of strawberries and hope because that sounds a lot nicer!
...Wait... stop! The ryhme is off!
Can you have more ryhme this time, less variation.
Wednesday 24th June 2015 7:05 pm
There is me...lying.
Not lying like you say.
Lying on the floor, lying like I say.
Begging, weeping, asking.
You carnival figure, you.
You war hero, you.
You champion, you.
One leg propped upon my stomach.
Where are your gold stamps, your badges, your medals?
The trophy you stand on is all battered.
You have laid me out on the floor, the doormat
Withholding the welcome sign.
You roll m...
Tuesday 21st April 2015 9:59 pm
Inspired by Nirvana's song 'heart-shaped box'. The line "I want to eat your cancer" was so strong and powerful, really got me thinking
I want to eat your cancer,
Sip your darkness, your evils,
Drink from your chalice of disease,
Soak up your pain, bathe in it, wash in it...
So that you are dry.
And when you are too dry;
Powdery, breaking, crumbling,
Ill offer you a dri...
Saturday 13th December 2014 5:15 pm
There’s a floor called race and a home called blood,
it can be what forms you.
It can be what clothes you, what warms you as it flows through your body,
a rich honey providing brotherhood, relation, family and love -
bonds of pride which cartwheel through your body.
I have a mystery and in my father lies the clues.
I had droplets of speciality, uniqueness, distinction, excitement...
Saturday 29th November 2014 10:59 pm
The nature, the ‘should’ is all intact.
But you must look further, seek the abstract,
The magpies watching with their pitiless black eyes,
Who will steal your jewelled secrets and spy.
Who will sit on your shoulder, whispering sin till you rely.
So little magpie, you must die.
Little shadows which dissipate, hiding in the trees,
Get you crawling, searching on your knees
Till the sticks...
Sunday 12th October 2014 4:38 pm
Inside her closet are the remains of a broken umbrella with the materials in cinders.
Her skin cloak is draped over a spindley coat stand,
most people name it a spine,
most people's are strong,
They carry the puppet as if a master holding strings...
But sometimes autum's trees fall down
because nature is flawed.
Sometimes a stem ca...
Thursday 9th October 2014 8:19 pm
(‘Ask me why and I’ll spit in your eye’ - The Smiths)
Pinch the rogue flesh slipping from my jeans,
Dig each thumb and forefinger into my hand,
Scratch me with that caress and turn when I blush,
Let the fire wash over my face whilst pretending not to realise.
Leave me be even though our legs are intertwined,
Please leave me be even though our mouths talk and share,
Leave me be even thou...
Saturday 4th October 2014 6:20 pm
(I've been struggling to show anyone this poem for a long time but I've been inspired to let it free. These feelings are behind me now and it turns out writing was to thank for that afterall)
How does someone stop cutting?
Do they cut into the paper instead?
Replace flesh and blood with diaries and ink,
Replace physicality with mentality,
Replace actions with words,
It isn’t enough....
Saturday 13th September 2014 11:35 am
(I'm aware this is a controversial poem and I hope not to offend anyone but I make no conclusions, I only ask questions)
The nature was deteriorating.
The sky was falling down,
raining pieces of ashy soot,
crashing and burning
and you weren't there.
Why weren't you there?
The birds squawked and screeched
and in-between their cries were mine, calling
and I was reaching out to you.
Sunday 31st August 2014 8:34 pm
A lot about her,
yet I know nothing about her.
She shapes words
but I hear emptiness
and all that exists her mouth is air.
She gives me carbon dioxide
but little care,
little advice or help,
Just ambiguous comments,
large words meaning nothing
and letters sounding silence.
Monday 11th August 2014 11:01 pm