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Tossed At Sea

This ship that I’ve chosen to sail be proven swift and strong.

We’ve weathered much together, she and I.

So many days amidst the wind and storms we’ve travelled long

to cross this mighty ocean here beneath the endless sky.

 

Sometimes it seems that this will be how I spend all my days,

like being tossed at sea is all there is.

It’s hard to hold out faith that there be more...

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endurancehardshipjourneylifeperseverancestruggle

My chest hurts

It’s the weighted chest pain

That’s hardest to explain 

The interwoven, the lingering

It spins a web across every day

It’s the fog you learn to see through

Because you can’t get away 

Never the needle in your eye

The thorn in your side

It’s the routine of soft pain 

The clingy sting for life 

It’s the dull ache

Freedom, but on a leash

Your mother's kiss with tee...

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dullemotionescapeeverydayfilterFreegriphealhearthurtidentityinterwovenjourneyleashlingeringlivingmental healthnormalpainprisonrelationshipsroutinesadnesssoftstruggletortureupsetwound

Hand on darkness

Some years ago, I realised

I am the driver of my life

And so I chose light

 

It was a difficult decision

More difficult than it sounds

It’s hard to know what it is to see

When there’s no darkness around

It’s easy to equate pain with feeling

To attach pain to being 

And so I never ran from the dark

I marched towards it

Let it smoke my heart

Instead, it was alw...

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Missing People

 

I still remember

Cold faces in my bedroom

Smiling women in the dark

Slicked hair, teeth sharp

I still remember

The man whose legs

Popped out from under my bed

And I screamed

Broad daylight was frightening

Heart speeding, head beating

The men who moved closer towards me

All I could do was freeze

I’d stare back

With sucked breath, shaking knees

Day afte...

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🌷(5)

anxietyapparitioncomplexcomplicatedconflictingconnectdeaddisconnectdiscoverendexperiencehallucinationhealingimaginationinteractionjourneymental healthmissingmourningmoving onpeopleprocesspsychosisPTSDquestionsrebirthrecoveryrememberrestartsleepwalkspiritualtraumaunderstandunidentifiedvisitzombie

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