Pinned down to the paper doll you created for me to be

Pieces of myself sliced away to better fit the mold

Never allowed to grow away from your expectations

Why have I never been deserving of your love?

I will never understand how someone can find such joy in ripping apart another

Why do you laugh when you hear my screams?

Why do you smile when you see my tears?

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Now we have finished 2022,
What did it mean for me and you?
Had it been for you a lovely year?
Or was it full of dread and fear?

In 2023 do you feel you'll cope?
And shall it contain joy and hope?
Will it contain great determination?
Will it bring unhappiness or elation?

Is it a year for special missions?
And one to plan new ambitions?
Shall it be a year full of belief?
And from you...

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I'm looking at all the warning signs. Staring them straight in the face and baring my claws.

Will I bite?

I scream, scratch, scare everyone away but wish for someone to stay.

I will not be absent from myself. My emotions, hobbies, wants, and needs must be safe, secured, unable to be touched by any partner, by any friendship or by anyone, Please.

Retiring the word gaslightng and leaning...

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