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A - Z of Sex

A is for anal, hard and fast

B is for bareback, cock sailing full mast.

C is for cum cannon shot, orifice ahoy,

D is for my dick, your favourite sex toy.

 

E is for ecstasy as I suspend you tantrically,

F is for fuck, no time for romantically.

G is for gag as you're gasping for air,

H is for the hard on I'm rocking downstairs.

 

I is for insatiable...

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You Can’t Get Tits on a Kindle – an ode to Generation OMG

You can't get tits on a kindle,

so put that Amazon one down.

Your materialistic bullshit

truly does make me frown.

 

I got by on handmedown clothes,

chick sticks and Aldi own brand.

You really look silly with that massive phone kid,

it's bigger than your hand.

 

To me COD was a special chippy tea

on a Wednesday night, granddad got it for me.

...

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Queer Terrorists - Collab with Brownie for OpenMind LGBT Special

I'm gonna cum all over this page
Swallow this microphone like a cock with rage
I is Brownie I is gay
Were queer terrorists today
This is Bidaman a suicide bummer

*The name's Bidaman,

wanted Suicide bummer.

My fingers tickle your insides like

an eclectic guitar strummer.

Like Oasis I'll strike a chord if only

the one,

till I hit you again and the bomb ...

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Ashes to Ashes

Love sick,
Love torn,
Love lost,
misplaced trust,
not in God,
but in us,
in I and you,
what was lust
turned so quickly
to earth scorched
red as angry rust.
There ain't no God, Mister,
there ain't no God,
but those who believe
believe in what they must
until that final day
when boxed and earthed
we will return
ashes to ashes
and dust to dust.

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