Tue 14th Dec 2010 21:39
Minor typo in stanza 5 line 6 'you' should read 'your' I think but otherwise a superb overview of war overseas - was your uncle one of the forgotten army in Wingate's Chindits I wonder
Comment is about Percy (blog)
Original item by Andy N
Tue 14th Dec 2010 21:31
I liked especially 'cute as a muffin top' and the implications in stanza 2 - nicely done
Comment is about plump blond girl (blog)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Tue 14th Dec 2010 20:38
Thank you Dave, Stef and Rachael. :)
Yes Isobel, Benji is our little terrier, or the hairy man in this poem. Thank you for comment,glad you like it. Funnily enough, in my case I started out with comic verse, and the serious stuff was branching out for me!
Comment is about Sharing (blog)
Original item by Lynn Dye
Tue 14th Dec 2010 20:28
I love the opening line. If poems were football teams I would be putting a bid in for it
Comment is about Santa (blog)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 20:24
A good world needs knowledge, kindliness, and courage; it does not need a regretful hankering after the past or a fettering of the free intelligence by the words uttered long ago by ignorant men. It needs a fearless outlook and a free intelligence. It needs hope for the future, not looking back all the time toward a past that is dead, which we trust will be far surpassed by the future that our intelligence can create.
Apart from the above caveat I enjoyed the poem. Every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings
Comment is about Explaining My Religion (blog)
Original item by Isobel
These are lovely sentiments and so appropriate.
I like the way you've divided the poem with 'I care not' and 'I care' - it makes both perspectives powerful.
Tue 14th Dec 2010 20:10
Ha - yes - I'd agree - the way someone dies can immortalise them - project them often beyond what they actually were - witness John Lennon for that. The message of Christ was a beautiful one though - not to be dwarfed by the manner in which he died.
Tue 14th Dec 2010 20:09
Comment is about Gaudete (blog)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 20:05
I like this and it clearly explains 'your' religion. I don't regard myself as a true Christian as I believe we ought to concentrate on what he said in the Sermon on the Mount and not on his death, which has become all-consuming. But I'm starting to preach now...!
Tue 14th Dec 2010 19:33
Blondes have more fun, they say. Perhaps plump blondes have twice the fun! I like it.
Tue 14th Dec 2010 19:31
I think this is magnificent, John. It's Northern English social history in a nutshell. No nonsense northern grit! Beautifully written and spoken. A gem, in my view.
Comment is about Colliers and Kids (blog)
Original item by John Coopey
Tue 14th Dec 2010 18:23
Hi Antonionio - I agree with your comment on Botswana and have amended it as you suggest - many thanks
Comment is about Antonionioni (poet profile)
Original item by Antonionioni
Tue 14th Dec 2010 17:52
so - it's the evil Christmas-fairy a-woken up, is it ?
and whose been rattling your cage ?
all ready for Xmas then ?
bought plenty of mistletoe?
sure you've got enough?
yes, I'd nip down the shops if I were you - just to be on the safe side :) xxx
Comment is about for you (blog)
Original item by Banksy
Tue 14th Dec 2010 17:38
This is lovely, Carole.
Comment is about Kissed (blog)
Original item by Shoeless Carole
Tue 14th Dec 2010 17:27
No it can't.
Tue 14th Dec 2010 17:24
Is Benji the hairy man?
I love the humour in this Lynn - branching out from serious stuff is wonderful but so hard to do sometimes. We are such a miserable bunch of bastards by nature...
Tue 14th Dec 2010 17:21
Benji deserves that footstool :) lovely hehe x
Tue 14th Dec 2010 16:53
Santa Claus? How about Father Christmas, his real name! Or even Saint Nicholas? (If he is a saint, he must come down from heaven every year to do the deliveries, rather than live in a shack at the North Pole as is popularly believed. (I like the poem, by the way!! I see the loss of innocence theme)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 16:48
Philipos - I really like the rhythm - although personally I think 'Circa 1993' could be reduced to 'Circa 93'....
Comment is about Botswana (blog)
Original item by Philipos
Tue 14th Dec 2010 15:29
everytime that Lynn comes in,Benji,s on the footstool-get a bone n tempt him off-or put on ravels bolero!-the cheek of that bowser-taking over the Dye household-good one Benj boy! warm regards to all there-Stef.xx
Tue 14th Dec 2010 15:25
hi Lynn-thanks for bunion news-alls fine-apart from my home 'hub' goin hoff in a huff-the bt man cometh-soon I Hope! sending this from daughters house-thanks for concern-Stef-xx
Comment is about Lynn Dye (poet profile)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 15:24
Delightfully saucy, think that may work for me on occasions, lol.
Thank you John also for your lovely comments on my ghazal. x
Comment is about Triolet de la Petite Mort (blog)
Original item by John Aikman
Tue 14th Dec 2010 15:15
Hi Win, belated thank you for lovely comments on my ghazal, not easy, are they, lol. x
Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Tue 14th Dec 2010 15:12
Hi Dave, thank you so much for lovely comments on my ghazal and for "Sharing" - ouch is right! lol.
Love your shopping ghazal too, it is excellent! x
Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)
Original item by Dave Bradley
Tue 14th Dec 2010 15:07
Hi Ann, thank you for such lovely comments on my poems, and concern for my foot, I think it's slowly healing. Hope you are getting over the sniffles by now. Take care. Lynn xx
(P.S. my sister lives in Hayle - are you anywhere near her?)
P.P.S. Love your Ruby Slippers! xx
Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 14:36
Migraine - urgh, I know you. Horrible to experience, but bloody good fall back for sickies ;)
Comment is about Halo. (blog)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 14:27
Liked this a lot Ray - love how you change the perspective into it being you/Santa :)
That's a sad story there Isobel, must be so weird to spend xmas without your kid.
My lass still remembers how she found out about father christmas. I'd been doing the tooth fairy thing, took the tooth out from under the pillow and put it on the bedside table, put the coin under the pillow, and forgot the tooth! She confronted me with it next morning (aged 7) and said 'does this mean that you were lying about father christmas too?'!!! Busted!
Tue 14th Dec 2010 13:58
PS No-one outgrows stockings in my house - they are forced to have them - nuts they don't crack - tangerines that go mushy - nasty reindeeers that shit chocolate raisins - it's all about tradition!
Tue 14th Dec 2010 13:56
I'm glad to see you back too. I feared you may end up in Wolverhampton.
It has ocurred to me that this is probably the last year that my youngest will still believe in Santa and as she isn't spending Christmas with me, that is sad.
You cover a lot in here - the loss of all that innocence and wonder is a tough one for parents. More so observing the differences between present youth and what we used to be. I enjoyed this poem - though it's a little sad. Great finishing line. x
Tue 14th Dec 2010 12:41
Beautiful a cappella and beautifully written, too. Also like the painting! Brings colour, musically, lyrically and visually on this dank day.
Comment is about Seasons left behind (blog)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 12:08
Hi Dave - thanks for your comments. I accept that some of the stuff i may put up causes some disagreement and even consternation, but at the end of the day it's only a point of view so hopefully no-one takes it personally. I thought your comments were very balanced and respectful considering you might disagree with some of the substance of the poem.
Tue 14th Dec 2010 12:05
Hi Steve - thanks for your comments. I'll hopefully get a chance to read some of yours and others' poems later today (at work!)
Comment is about Steve Regan (poet profile)
Original item by Steve Regan
Tue 14th Dec 2010 12:00
Many thanks everyone for comments! Sorry I'm late to reply because my home laptop is being repaired (hopefully).
To address one or two points raised - nothing can be truly known with absolute certainty, I certainly accept that, Banksy. I think we agree pretty much.
Dave B - yes, I agree with your points, much of the Bible does contain historical fact within it, although of course the perspective is not objective but nationalistic and from a particular faith's viewpoint (the Old Testament, I have in mind, but the same is true of the New Testament.) Therefore the Bible as history is comparable to, say a Shakespeare historical drama in that it isn't totally fact, it just contains some fact.
Steve - I wouldn't be as rude as to side with Nietzsche and say God is dead, but he does seem to have retired. After all he stopped speaking directly to his chosen people, after speaking to them regularly, two to three thousand years ago!
Chris - many thanks - you have made a number of observations which I appreciate and can't disagree with, LOL.
Ray - good point - does Jones refer to the Dow Jones? It COULD do...Ah, the usual pretentious stance of the 'artist'... I'll be honest and say i didn't think of that, i was thinking of keeping up with the Jones's, but it certainly could have that echo as well.
Andy - thanks for your comments!
Comment is about (End of) the golden age (blog)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 11:58
Thanks, Greg. A win over the Baggies doesn't quite compensate losing to the Blues, though.Good to be back.
Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Tue 14th Dec 2010 11:48
I thought that from "His hands small..." to "...in her spine." was terrific but, to be honest, I don't connect the poem with the sculpture in any way, shape or form.
Comment is about The gaps between hope (blog)
Original item by Maria Gornell
Tue 14th Dec 2010 11:30
I think this is really good, Cayn. As Freda says, that about sums up our potty world!
Comment is about The Bigger Picture (blog)
Original item by Cayn White
Tue 14th Dec 2010 10:07
I'm with Yeats - one should tread softly where dreams are concerned.
Comment is about when we met (blog)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 09:26
Nice one Lynn. Bunion op....ouch!
Tue 14th Dec 2010 08:48
Hi Andy No need to apologise! Yesterday, I had to ask the window cleaner for his name again - I just can't ever remember it! It's Jason by the way.
Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 08:16
hi dave; - god knows why i called john on my comment on your piece, but it's still a really good piece.
Comment is about David Cooke (poet profile)
Original item by David Cooke
Tue 14th Dec 2010 01:31
As always, very heartfelt...
You are not alone.
Comment is about untitled (blog)
Tue 14th Dec 2010 01:28
Nice to see you posting again...
Yes, we are who we are because of our experiences. Ideally, you should never regret what you have done - only what you haven't done.
Comment is about Scars(the poem of life's learning curve) (blog)
Original item by Ridge A. Dillard
Mon 13th Dec 2010 21:11
Mmmm... maybe ; )
Comment is about Tommy Carroll (poet profile)
Original item by Tommy Carroll
Mon 13th Dec 2010 20:11
You do 'bah, humbug' very well, Ray. I like "I spent years perfecting these stories" and "the world gets paler every winter", despite all the fairy lights. Musical moments include shape-shifter, closed-circuit TV camera, celebrity culture. Good stuff. Good to see you back here too. I'm sure it's just coincidence that Villa beat the Baggies at the weekend...
Mon 13th Dec 2010 19:32
It seems a long poem to read, more so than to hear, perhaps. After a while you know what to expect next.Still, lot of nice lines, Reagan resurrected as Palin etc.So in the fifth verse are you referring to the Dow Jones or the Jones's?
Mon 13th Dec 2010 18:44
I have to disagree myself with a few voices on here that have commented....subjectivity being king and all that. First of all I think it is a brilliant poem Tony and one of if not your best...it's excellent!!!
Also I personally do not think it overly long at all. I think it is a fantastic peice and I for one am glad that it says all that it does.
I saw Tony perform this and believe me the science reference comes across as obviously ironic. In fact I think it is fairly obvious on the page that this is ironic...but maybe that is because I know Tony?
Science is merely another belief...
Tony knows that's not the case, but he is also playing with a little nuance in reference to the word belief and the idea of truth.
Anyone who knows the scientific method knows the fundamental difference between belief and science.
It does not matter if science is wrong, which from time to time it is. Science derives from the foundation of saying;
We propose, we evidence and we substantiate the best possible explanation and fit when it comes to facts and truth. But it also comes with the key caveat/proviso that anything that is evidenced in future as a better explanation and fit will supersede current thought.
This is known as paradigm shift.
Belief and faith are radically different in that they are unshakeable and blindly hold on to a set position irrespective of anything else. Faith and belief not only ignore emerging evidence they have absolutely no requirement for it!
I think Tony's target here, that of this orthodoxy is entirely reasonable. In fact to all people with logical independent minds it is more than reasonable. This is not an attack on religious people- it is an attack on organised religion that causes so much misery and medals in science and creates its own pseudoscience.
Throughout the poem we have ripe and justifiable targets and a real and independent voice shines through.
The repetition of the line
'end of the golden age'
works really well and I really like the broad brush strokes and subjects that are swept across with ire, contempt and at times resignated irony.
I hope to hear you perform this the whole way through next time Tony as I was really enjoying it on the night.
Mon 13th Dec 2010 17:48
Hey Gus, thanks for the feedback on Forbidden Fruit...glad you liked it.
Hopefuly catch you at an upcoming event in the New Year, be it Bolton, Middleton or Wigan.
Have a lovely Christmas
Comment is about Gus Jonsson (poet profile)
Original item by Gus Jonsson
Mon 13th Dec 2010 17:11
Hello Alison. Middle couplet is very good. Like Steve I wasn't so impressed by the last couplet.I think you'd improve the rhythm by using Christmas instead of Nativity and wouldn't "Joan had sex, whilst drunk, with Gordon" be more natural?
Comment is about 42nd Noel (blog)
Original item by Alison Smiles
Mon 13th Dec 2010 17:10
Great aural poem, Antonionioni. Bleak in tone for bleak times with plenty of political and (a few) religious barbs. Liked these lines ... All use modern media
To get medieval ideas to ya"
Though for "medieval ideas" I read "enduring truths".
Hey, God ain't finished with us yet!
Mon 13th Dec 2010 15:56
I think you may be right I'm veering towards 'white fellas' without italics. The trouble is I write about a lot of foreign stuff and use a lot of foreign terms. It is often hard to know where to draw the line between words that are still foreign or have actually become naturalized. I also seem to be doing a lot of stuff these days that could be termed 'reportage' - which I have no problem with (I'm a big Auden fan) although some people don't seem to keen. In that context 'fellas' might be better and not so melodramatic. Its slightly dismissive tone is also a wry comment on white supremacy.
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