Greg Freeman

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 13:44

Thanks, Jeff! Fixed now - apologies, Shadwell! I think that's the only one ... meant to check them all last night, but I was too knackered.

Comment is about Write Out Loud's Olympics competition: voting ends tonight (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Jeff Dawson

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 13:24

Like it MC, very amusing and thanx for your comment Jeff

Comment is about OLYMPIC DREAMS (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Jeff Dawson

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 13:22

Graham/Greg - Shadwell might demand a stewards enquiry here - his link goes to 'A Sporting Heart' Darren Scanlon!

Comment is about Write Out Loud's Olympics competition: voting ends tonight (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Yvonne Brunton

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 13:13

I love the 'lycra on pedals'

I fear Tommy has vented his spleen a tad prematurely - there's still the paralympics to come.

Comment is about Gold (blog)

Original item by steve mellor

Jeff Dawson

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 13:12

Hi Tommy, appreciate your thoughts and concern, as I work in benefits I have a good understanding of what the issues are and know about the cuts. I feel with the government going hell for leather though they would have happened anyway.

Yes £9 billion is a hell of a lot of money, funnily enough similar to amount spent on housing benefit each year. I would imagine though a lot of that has gone to firms and employees involved in the games, yes there are major concerns but hopefully at the end of the day there wont be any major loss and we've had something to be proud of it.

You mentioned disabled people, I believe nearly all 2.5 million tickets have been sold for the paralympics, surely that can't be wrong.

Comment is about School playing fields: (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

steve pottinger

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 11:48

Thanks, Laura. Glad you liked it! I think I'll be giving the poem its first public airing at 'Poems, Prose, and Pints' in Harrogate tomorrow - always interesting to see how a poem works (or doesn't) in front of an audience....

Comment is about Rumbled. (blog)

Original item by steve pottinger

Ann Foxglove

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 09:11

Hi Elizabeth - a warm welcome to WOL. Hope you enjoy the site!

Comment is about Elizabeth Renee Jennings (Poet profile)

Original item by Elizabeth Renee Jennings

Ann Foxglove

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 09:09

Hi Richard - a warm welcome to WOL. And good luck with your poetry journey!

Comment is about Richard Alfred (Poet profile)

Original item by Richard Alfred

Laura Taylor

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 09:03

Cheers fella, re Unsolicited :)

Comment is about steve pottinger (Poet profile)

Original item by steve pottinger

Laura Taylor

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 09:02

I really like the length of it as it goes. I'm guilty myself of writing far too much at times, and spend ages trimming and editing, but I think every line is required in this, and it's a beautiful long piece.

I totally identify with the getting older and being not as capable of physical violence/defence/whatever you wanna call it, but the blood still comes up.

A great write

Comment is about Rumbled. (blog)

Original item by steve pottinger

M.C. Newberry

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 02:04

I wonder just how many times the sight of two old "head and shoulders" huddled together on a sea-front bench will conjure up these lines in the future. A charming little "vignette" of life's chances, missed and taken.

Comment is about St. Swithin’s Day (blog)

Original item by Ralph Dartford

M.C. Newberry

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 01:52

JC - I don't know Billie Davis - and my various song lists make no reference to her...only the singers I mentioned elsewhere. But thanks for the interest and getting me to check!
Perhaps I could persuade Dolly Parton to make it a hit
with the right tune?!!!

Comment is about TELL HIM - a lyric for all those Women in Country! (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

M.C. Newberry

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 01:42

Isobel - as I wrote in another context on WOL -
there's no copyright in a title. Besides, MINE
has BIGGER letters - so there :-)
I'm not sure if I want you to win(?) but humour deserves its place on the podium.

Comment is about Isobel (Poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Lynn Dye

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Tue 14th Aug 2012 00:00

Beautiful and sad.

As always you read so well, and this is very moving with the good choice of music.
Excellent stuff, Mike.
Lynn.

Comment is about Destination Unknown (blog)

Original item by Noetic-fret!

Isobel

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 23:47

I appear to have posted mine a day later than your original posting. Sorry the title was the same. I don't recall reading this before posting mine - but apologies if I was unduly influenced.

Comment is about OLYMPIC DREAMS (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Lynn Dye

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 23:43

Thank you for your comment, Dave. No need to bin it as it was meant to be general anyway. I didn't even see the Olympic final and now think I should have done! (Not for the Spice Girls though, haha) Thanks again.

Comment is about Endeavour (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

Greg Freeman

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 23:40

Not at all, Steve, thanks for pointing it out. Your one is sorted, anyway. Let us know of any others, peeps!

Comment is about Write Out Loud's Olympics competition: voting ends tonight (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Lynn Dye

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 23:38

Thank you everyone. :o)

Isobel, glad you said that, I wasn't sure about rhyming in a free verse!

Hugh, well hopefully, lol. Cheers.

John, at least I never mentioned thrashing!!!

Harry, your comment made me laugh.

Appreciate all your comments.

Comment is about Abandonment (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

Lynn Dye

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 23:27

I get really nostalgic when I think back to the sweetie shops I frequented when I was small. I really like the feel of this poem, Stef, good one.

Comment is about Opposite establishments (blog)

steve mellor

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 23:01

Sorry to be a pain in the bum, but my poem 'Golden Girl' has been omitted from the list, and I have a feeling that there may be a couple more

Comment is about Write Out Loud's Olympics competition: voting ends tonight (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

steve pottinger

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 22:06

Harry, you're the first person to mention the idea of novels!

I do know what you mean about the poem's length - and agree there could easily be another, more concise poem lurking in there. One with less of a narrative. I think I'll let the dust settle on this one first, and then see about paring it down to create another 'thinner' poem.

Thanks very much for your comments.

Comment is about Rumbled. (blog)

Original item by steve pottinger

Harry O'Neill

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 21:50


Sexy - woman - sexy

Stop it!

Comment is about Abandonment (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

Katy Hughes

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 21:37

Errr...not quite! Just naughty antics in a graveyard : )

Comment is about John Coopey (Poet profile)

Original item by John Coopey

Harry O'Neill

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 21:08


Steve,
Can`t make up my mind whether the length enhances the fear and the sense of former youth slipping away - or decreases it.

No doubt you`ve been told before that you would make a good novelist (maybe a kind of anglicised Chandler) But some of the lines in this made me wonder if they would work better in a `thinner` story.

Such as:

`Nothing, Job, arteries, heart`,

`Hobbled by a creeping age
that takes no prisoners`

` Myself before the fire inside
Began to turn to clinker`

` Today, I only smell the feral stink
` of violence brewing here`

Are worth showing off a bit more.

Enjoyable.

Comment is about Rumbled. (blog)

Original item by steve pottinger

steve pottinger

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 19:42

Thanks for the kind words, M.C. It took a lot of grafting and editing to chisel the poem into what you see now, but I think I'm happy with it. I really wanted to try and capture that sense of someone feeling their youth slipping away, with all the implications that can have for their place in the world....

Comment is about Rumbled. (blog)

Original item by steve pottinger

Harry O'Neill

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 19:38


Thanks all for being so kind.

Isobel,
Thanks for the tip, but it`s okay if I`ve left it too late...It`s actually the first part of poem I`m hoping to complete on a different ending theme and which (If I can finish the bloody thing!) I hope to blog later..I posted it in desperation at not doing an Olympic one.

Thanks anyway

Comment is about VENUS AT THE NET (blog)

Shirley Smothers

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 18:12

Lovely poem.
Sad and realistic.
Thanks for the great read.

Shirley

Comment is about Destination Unknown (blog)

Original item by Noetic-fret!

M.C. Newberry

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 16:06

Unusual choice of rhythm in words. Good one!

Comment is about VENUS AT THE NET (blog)

M.C. Newberry

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 15:56

This hits home with the force of a sock full of ball-bearings! Harsh and merciless in its evocation of "then and now". I detect something of the blunt-force trauma prose of Raymond Chandler...or Mickey Spillane on a good day!

Comment is about Rumbled. (blog)

Original item by steve pottinger

Marcus Cooke

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 15:35

Hi, pleased to meet you. Please feel free to call me call me zenith. Looks like a fantastic site and really glad i discovred it! Many thanks.

Comment is about Marcus Cooke (Poet profile)

Original item by Marcus Cooke

John Coopey

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 15:19

I hope this works, MC. You old goat!
Whenever I do a poem for Our Gert she calls me a skinflint and demands to know "Where are the flowers?"
After further thoughts I'm thinking the Billie I recall was Billie Davis?
Certainly Jet Harris was a favourite of mine. The first record I ever bought was "Diamonds". Cost me 4/11d. (I play it rather badly on the geetar)

Comment is about TELL HIM - a lyric for all those Women in Country! (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

John Coopey

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 15:13

Nice one, Harry.
Great discipline and rhythm.

Comment is about VENUS AT THE NET (blog)

John Coopey

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 15:01

Naughty, naughty!

Comment is about Abandonment (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

John Coopey

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 15:00

She takes the kids to school each day.
The darling little doves;
And lights a gasper in the car
To kill the ones she loves.

Comment is about Smokey Thoughts (blog)

Original item by hugh

Ann Foxglove

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 13:47

Hi Mr Quazar - or may I call you Zenith? Welcome to WOL - I hope you will enjoy being a part of the site :)

Comment is about Marcus Cooke (Poet profile)

Original item by Marcus Cooke

Ann Foxglove

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 13:44

Hi Busy Bee - glad to welcome you to WOL. I hope you'll enjoy being a part of the site :)

Comment is about Busy Bee (Poet profile)

Original item by Busy Bee

Cynthia Buell Thomas

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 12:40

I met Gaia on Dec. 14, 2011, when she shared a poetry presentation at Manchester City Library. I have her small edition of 'Fine Bone China", featuring eleven outstanding poems which I have reread many times. They always give me sheer pleasure and quality inspiration. I feel it is too easy to mix up the overall term 'contemporary' with 'experimental'. Gaia's poetry is very accessible. She must be a superb teacher. I hope I can participate in her course.

Comment is about Gaia Holmes on writing modern poetry (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Lynn Dye

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 11:44

Wow, love this, very sensuous and some great lines

Comment is about IGNITED (blog)

Original item by Tracey bucknell

Tommy Carroll

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Mon 13th Aug 2012 00:38

thank christ's over

Comment is about Gold (blog)

Original item by steve mellor

Dave D Poet Rhumour

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 22:43

I feel this is a good piece Lynn, please don't 'bin it' as you implied you might.

My daughter developed Sports fever halfway through the 2nd week and was really fired up when watching the 5,000 M race, hehe. I remember being like that in the days of Coe & Ovett...

Best wishes, Dave

Comment is about Endeavour (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

tracey bucknell

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 20:59

hahahahha thanks jeff xx your welcome for comments.. it's a great poem...i know i really wanted to go :( but the coverage has been fantastic :))

Comment is about IGNITED (blog)

Original item by Tracey bucknell

Nick Coleman

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 16:35

Aw heck MC, this could make even this dried-up old misogynist get all lovey-dovey.

Comment is about TELL HIM - a lyric for all those Women in Country! (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

M.C. Newberry

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 15:02

Thanks Isobel - I wouldn't mind the likes of Tammy Wynette singing my lyric!

Comment is about TELL HIM - a lyric for all those Women in Country! (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Kesha

Sun 12th Aug 2012 12:37

Strong example. Let them not smoke their life away. Neatly penned Hugh!

Comment is about Smokey Thoughts (blog)

Original item by hugh

Lynn Dye

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 12:33

I'm in total agreement on this one, Hugh. A really good poem, it says it all.

Comment is about Smokey Thoughts (blog)

Original item by hugh

Tommy Carroll

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 12:08

go get'em Hugh!

Comment is about Smokey Thoughts (blog)

Original item by hugh

Jeff Dawson

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 10:18

Hi Isobel, like this look at the more contraversial side of the games. Great compilation of various events that have seen the darker side especially for those who lost out and yes agree about Ludmilla and always thought Sharon D was a cracker! Thanx for your comment on my olympic poem, like your dads way of thinking! X

Comment is about Olympic Dreams (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Isobel

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 10:12

Nice humour Ann :)

Comment is about wellie wangin' (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Isobel

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 10:09

Chuckles all round :)

Yes - there's a definite whiff of skullduggery round some gold medals. It was about time someone dedicated a poem to it!

Comment is about Golden Girl (blog)

Original item by steve mellor

Isobel

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Sun 12th Aug 2012 10:07

That's a great point you are making Tommy. The pledge to protect green belt will go much the same way, I fear...

Comment is about School playing fields: (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

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