Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:53
Cheers for your note on I Can Try chuck, appreciated :)
Comment is about Anthony Emmerson (Poet profile)
Original item by Anthony Emmerson
Thanks for your note on I can Try Cynthia, appreciate it. You're right, it doesn't mean forgive, necessarily, as that may well be impossible in some circumstances, and the trying is hard enough in the first place. Thanks :)
Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (Poet profile)
Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:45
Hi JC - "Enjambment" sounds like a good title for a poem about the capital's traffic!
Thanks for the comment. Love the place, hate
the people :-) (well, some...)
Comment is about MY LONDON (blog)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:42
Thanks, Mike, Greg, Win.At least one other person has said it seems like several poems so there must be something in that, Greg.
I wish it were more cathartic. We had a young bloke in the Mental Health place where I worked.I got on well with him. He felt he was an evil person. I asked him what he'd done that was evil. He replied that he'd cut in front of an old man on a bike, and made a mildly disparaging remark about a friend's weight gain. That was it - and I made some remark trivialising his "offences". He hung himself a few days later.
Comment is about A Multitude of Sins (blog)
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:40
Ooo I like this. Love the intertwining of the ideas and the classical figures/stories. Good one.
Comment is about Cupid and Psyche (blog)
Original item by Christopher Dawson
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:38
Comment is about Gerry Potter interviewed by Dominic Berry about 'THE MEN POMES' (blog)
Original item by Dominic Berry
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:35
What an interesting idea and piece. Really like this
Comment is about Sound Translations (blog)
Original item by Kealan Coady
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:34
Would agree with Isobel that you should keep race out of this, as it's verging on the offensive. I myself find the use of the word 'chav' offensive, as it goes.
Do you ever look deeper than the surface, Nick? You might be surprised if one day you ever try.
Comment is about CRAP TOWN (blog)
Original item by nick armbrister
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:24
The trouble with removal firms Anthony (and I can talk from experience) - is that they take along all your old crap with you. It doesn't matter where you live, it's all about perspective.
I now live in a crap town too - dodge the dogshit on my way to and from work/school. I've never been happier though!
I think this would make a funny performance rant - though I think you are better to keep racial differences out of it.
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:18
So that would be a show about men then?
Put me down for a ticket - I have a great interest in the opposite sex - and I'd love to see/hear just how they evaluate themselves :)
Tue 24th Jan 2012 16:05
And you've never considered relocating?
Tue 24th Jan 2012 15:55
Knew I'd read you before. I was looking at your new web site yesterday. Good stuff too.
Comment is about Winston Plowes (Poet profile)
Original item by Winston Plowes
Tue 24th Jan 2012 14:52
Loved this captured moment. I only really remember one enjoyable new years moment when I felt my daughter kick in her mums belly as the bongs went off. And it was the milenium. I have hid for some of the most recent ones
Comment is about New Year (blog)
Original item by Glyn Pope
Tue 24th Jan 2012 14:34
Thank you for reading my poem. I didn't think anyone would bother. I'm learning how to take the time myself to read other people's work. That is the way to learn. We have a lot in common. I feel honoured to have been alive at the same time as Picasso. A true genius. Less relevant my love of music is as broad as it is wide. And conversation if you're going to bother has to be stimulating. If you're not doing anything early September then we have a Literary Festival here in France. Ask away if you need further details. Best wishes Glyn
Tue 24th Jan 2012 14:25
Thank you to you all for bothering to comment. I love Cynthia's though - not because it says brilliant! - but the 'catching a mood like flat champagne in a bowl glass'
Tue 24th Jan 2012 13:30
Need a breather after this one Ray, So much to get from it as you explore. Win
Tue 24th Jan 2012 13:28
Hi Graham. Spent some sad moments with these powerful accurate words. Despair comes across aplenty when you understand the topic and try and understand the poeple in this. Win x
Comment is about P.O.E.M.S (blog)
Original item by Graham Sherwood
Tue 24th Jan 2012 13:18
Got a very empty desperate feeling from this. And we have both contributed something on a 'space' theme. Is there a connection I wonder? I liked the device you used to count to ten in the climax of your piece.
Keep well (inside and out)
Comment is about 10 Reasons for Nothing (blog)
Original item by Noetic-fret!
Tue 24th Jan 2012 13:14
Hi Solar. A funny and fun piece. Liked the way you freely play with the words and rhymes. My cats got 2 presents each!
Comment is about (Very) Random Act Of Xmas Woollenness (blog)
Original item by Solar
Tue 24th Jan 2012 13:09
Thanks for looking and commenting on my space found poem. I get a similar thing from the last 2 lines. How do we read them? Someone said that the 'she', for them was the earth. But in a poem that tries to express a conection between man and earth, this negative and lonely end is powerful.
Comment is about Solar (Poet profile)
Cynthia Buell Thomas
Tue 24th Jan 2012 13:07
The dream world is amazing, isn't it? Some dreams I can analyze realistically, with a bit of a mental recap of the previous hours or days, but others slip through. The human mind is the scariest thing I know - all else pales - the untapped, unleashed power of it!
Comment is about Fate Modern (blog)
Original item by Marianne Daniels
Tue 24th Jan 2012 13:05
Thanks for looking at my space lines
I liked that muscle line for the relationship between rustle/muscle and then over/other but it is a very strange image. Maybe your muscles feel differently in zero G.
Tue 24th Jan 2012 13:01
Thx for commenting on the lines from space.
I like the fact that these word have an interesting history, that all were born in space and have been reborn here. They say something different and differently. Viewed in this way, I think it is an interesting and creative process.
Yes, the accessibility of poetry and moreso of art in general is one of my favourite topics and it was great to see so many people run with it. Was at the Tate in Liverpool recently and watched a video of people talking about some 'pieces of art' (e.g. 3 basketballs suspanded in a tank of water) Some people concluded that the actual discussion and comments became part of the 'art experience' themselves and I could see this. All reactions are valid.
Comment is about (Poet profile)
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:57
Graham thx for looking at my rearanged space lines.
I like the fact that these word have an interesting history, that all were born in space and have been reborn here. They say something different and differently. Viewed in this way, I think it is an interesting and creative process. Don't worry though I won't stop scribbling.
Many thanks, Win
Comment is about Graham Sherwood (Poet profile)
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:56
One of your best, Dave, a character sketch that implies a saga. I like best the uncertainty of 'Dorothy' - cat, dog, pillow, photo, ghost? For me, the realism of the declining situation implies fantasy in its resolution. I find it well-crafted diction-wise, and would suggest only the removal of all punctuation, to let the reader sink or swim with your thoughts.
Comment is about This will do (blog)
Original item by Dave Bradley
Dave D Poet Rhumour
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:50
Hello Mike - my thanks to you for commenting on 'Call Out' - glad you enjoyed it :) Best wishes, Dave
Comment is about Noetic-fret! (Poet profile)
This is raw, very common, and damning.
Comment is about Don't cry: Etta James (blog)
Original item by Tommy Carroll
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:30
Really good one, Steve. 'keenest cut' missed me at first, but was clear the second time around. Verbal cuts are deadly ammunition. Please keep posting.
Comment is about But (blog)
Original item by steve mellor
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:25
Thanks for the comments guys! It really is nice to hear all your thoughts, as the poem really is based on a true story...and if I managed to evoke some kind of emotion in my readers than it means I am doing something right!
Or Robert Frost words it better; "No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader."
Comment is about Remembrance (blog)
Original item by Jonathan Mamczynski
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:23
I always like your mind, Ms Oxley. The last stanza is very Miss Haversham - deliberate soul-destruction.
Your personal photo is fab.
Comment is about dead daffodils (blog)
Original item by Ann Foxglove
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:21
Thanks for the kind words on "Remembrance". I really appreciate anyone who takes the time to read my stuff!
I also think that you are right about the ending. The main reason for me leaving it in was because it was originally an assignment for university - the task being to create a poem driven by repetition which I was just overly eager to emphasise...
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:18
Brilliant, catching a mood like flat champagne in a bowl glass.
Tue 24th Jan 2012 12:15
I really like this; reads like a squash exercise, the ball rapid fire bamming against the wall, with style. I did wonder at the casual 'take a life' between 'break a figurine' and 'go out without an umbrella', but it is eye-opening. IMO, this is an original 'list poem'.
Consider sorting out your use of capitals, so that your intent is clear. Maybe 'Act' needs full capitals, like a strong order.
Comment is about God is looking for action (blog)
Original item by Emma-Jane Stradling
Tue 24th Jan 2012 11:21
Hi John, I've got a plant just like that and it's been climbing all over me for years!
Comment is about John Coopey (Poet profile)
Original item by John Coopey
Tue 24th Jan 2012 09:53
Admirable and rich. But I felt there was almost too much here, Ray, that it could actually break down into three separate poems - the first stanza, then the next three, then the last one. I just envy your level of creativity!
Marianne Louise Daniels
Tue 24th Jan 2012 09:37
Thank you for the comments folks! This sort of stemmed from a dream I had - they are either just plain stupid dreams or scary apocalyptic ones.
Thank you for your words Cynthia. The painting is just for my profile and because I love it but... I wonder...
I do mean 'bear'. Thank you for pointing that out and will change it! x
Tue 24th Jan 2012 06:29
Thanks very much for your comments, chaps. Will take up most of your suggestions, Ray, and ta for them, although maybe not the Barga verse. I think I'm looking for a certain awkwardness of rhythm at times. Yes, John, it's been a while.
Comment is about Rooftops (for Bruno Cordati) (blog)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Tue 24th Jan 2012 01:20
Hi Win, believe it or not, i have the very same book. It is my favourite all time book and has been in my possession ever since my days in the army. (i think i bought it about 1989). I used to belong to the Encounters book club, alas, i can find no trace of that book club nowadays. I have viewed it that much, and it has travelled far, so much to say, it is in tatty condition now lol. But yes, such an awe inspiring subject. We could debate it all night, i just wish i could go into far off galaxies sometimes.
Tue 24th Jan 2012 00:01
Hi Kay, Enjoyed looking at this. Some fine rhymes and original ideas, Thx for posting.
a compacted soul afloat
not blissful or ironic but occasionally gnomic
I continue to exist when brutal doors are closed
I think and feel regardless of your year.
I felt this little section as a mini gem within the whole, had so much to offer and could mean so much to so many. It was the last four words that held me :-)
Comment is about Gnomic love affairs (blog)
Original item by kayberley
Tue 24th Jan 2012 00:00
Short and simple homage to the city, MC. I like the enjambment. (I just looked it up to see if I'd spelled it right and the dictionary fell open at "frog" - spooky, or what?)
Like the poem - hate the place!
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 23:46
Hi Ksy. Really enjoyed this. Makes the reader search behind the lines and in doing so maybe search inside themselves, Win x
Comment is about Untitled as yet! (blog)
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 23:40
I can really identify with this piece. But, I am imagining myself the subject of protection lol. In essence it's a very good poem. I just wonder whom it's aimed at, and how they would feel about it.
Just proves you care really. But at what cost, only the future will tell eh?
Stay well kayberley.
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 23:36
Seems a while since you've posted Greg.
Nice imagery, particularly the last part about turning his attention from the gipsy girls to the rooftops, gutters etc.
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 23:33
Very vivid, Dave, in its imagery but nicely ambivalent in its meaning.
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 23:28
Interesting piece. The last line......hmmmm! Makes me think of the old mans attachments or, his agedness. Very clever how it imbues upon the reader to go back again and read it, just in case you missed something the first time round.
Actually, i think i enjoyed this piece more than at first thought.
Comment is about An inoffensive old man (blog)
Original item by Peter Asher
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 23:14
Hi Ray, I like this piece not only for its content, but for its non conformity. It proves itself as a sincere piece of writing by what I would describe as honesty, and though it is a heart wrenching piece to have had to have written, I can imagine the catharsis would do no wrong to yourself or others. For me, for some reason, this poem touched a nerve in me I'm not sure whether i wish to explore, but in saying that, it goes to show just how intense and exploratory it is.
Nice work, not just nice work, but a top piece of writing. Goona go away to ponder now.
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 23:13
Hi Mike, Thx for looking at my space stuff... you are right it is a massive awe inspiring subject. Images of Earth is a found poem however, All the lines in it were found in
'The Home Planet (Images and Reflections of Earth from Space Explorers)'. Kevin W.Kelley. Macdonald Queen Anne Press 1988. I was interested to see how comments from these astronauts expressed themselves in this book and how these experiences might alter their religion and philosophy. Whether this explores that idea or not I don't know but I do like these exercises. Truth is that this thing is so big, how can anyone do it justice in words? Win
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 23:12
glad ive inspired you mike... love putting smiles on peoples face :-). I write my poems as how ive experienced the day and from the heart. Never let your poetry drift, ive been told its a gift! Thank you very much for your kind words x
Comment is about "KENTMERE".... (blog)
Original item by Lesley Whittaker
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 22:58
Mike, my heart goes out to you. When someone close becomes a casualty, or a colleague etc, it hits home just how fragile we really are, and that, any of us, could go at any time by many means. You must be deep in philosophical thought at present.
Stay safe, stay well
Comment is about How mad (blog)
Original item by mike watts
Mon 23rd Jan 2012 22:53
Aye Man Dave,
'hear hear' great poem.
Comment is about Call Out (blog)
Original item by Dave Dunn
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