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Shirley Smothers

Wed 14th May 2014 17:24

Hello Dominic

Thank you for your comments on my Brevette Poems(Second Edition)
The original set was a writing challenge. M.C. Newberry suggested a fourth poem. I don't write a lot but it's fellow poets like you that inspire me.

Thanks,
Shirley

Comment is about Dominic James (poet profile)

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M.C. Newberry

Wed 14th May 2014 15:40

Another witty take on modern life from this reliable
source.
And one can only wonder about the reasons for the
EU action. Surely nothing to do with its own
activities and being unwilling to be financially
scrutinised by accountants?!!

Comment is about Google Never Forgets (blog)

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Richard

Wed 14th May 2014 15:11

I might text Ian I did the fest last year. Yea bit of a low profile of late. Have posted a new poem yesterday though. Catch you soon I heard you were on in Wigan and may get to Tudor soon

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Ian Whiteley

Wed 14th May 2014 14:59

I'm good Richard thank you - haven't seen you for a while - have our paths failed to cross or are you keeping a low profile :-) - I'm at the Cadence festival afternoon in June and going to Bolton on Sunday - are you at either of those?

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Richard

Wed 14th May 2014 14:56

Hey Ian how's it going

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Richard

Wed 14th May 2014 14:55

Really like the parting missed this somehow. Cool

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Dominic James

Wed 14th May 2014 14:35

good choice Dave,
I love the moose, she sure is plain.

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

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Isobel

Wed 14th May 2014 14:22

Succinct :)

Comment is about BETTER K/NOT. (blog)

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Isobel

Wed 14th May 2014 14:21

Love it! Especially love the last verse and line - very subtle - nothing wrong with YOUR metaphors :)

Comment is about On Task (blog)

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Ian Whiteley

Wed 14th May 2014 14:17

thanks for the comment on 'under the bridge' harry - it is a type of person I can't abide - the troll - dregs of humanity - hope that came across loud and clear in the narrative - cheers

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Wed 14th May 2014 11:54

Fabulous, fast and funny, and gut-wrenching in its truth. I often wonder if men really do 'get it'. Surely some must.

Comment is about On Task (blog)

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Wed 14th May 2014 11:47

There are so many known 'personalities' under severe scrutiny at the moment, I'm not sure which one is the 'target'; but that may be a good thing. The poem has a universality in it that might be spoiled by a specific allusion. The final two lines are really sharp.

You poke insightful barbs at societal inconsistencies really well.

Comment is about Plausible deniability (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Wed 14th May 2014 11:25

Your innate skill for unusual associations and outstanding imagery continues, ever, it seems, more polished than the last poem. 'the navy scurry of office legs' and 'pinned folklore' are corkers. And the sound quality throughout is really breathtaking. As is the sustained mood, highlighted by the precise use of 'terrible', in 'the terrible bird'.

As 'biro' was about six years ago,'lacuna' is one of those 'in' words these days. Your usage is challenging.

I can see why commas were integral.

Comment is about Raven (blog)

Original item by Marianne Daniels

Travis Brow

Wed 14th May 2014 07:19

I'm presuming 'fall' in the last line, refers to the season? I like the concision of this piece - it has the restraint and depth of a haiku. The contrast of the American 'fall' and the more English 'pavement' is indicative of the time you say you spend between New York and London. Short and sweet - nice.

Comment is about Seasons (blog)

Original item by Charlotte

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Jeff Dawson

Tue 13th May 2014 14:13

Excellent Richard can feel the struggle, see ya soon Jeff

Comment is about Listless (blog)

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Marianne Louise Daniels

Tue 13th May 2014 12:46

brilliant! Love it!

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Harry O'Neill

Tue 13th May 2014 12:27


Dave,
Those pot-holes are there to break crank-
shafts - not ankles!

Hope you have a speedy recovery back to your beloved walking..

Yvonne and I recovering (slowly - but steadily)

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

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Marianne Louise Daniels

Tue 13th May 2014 12:21

thank you!

Comment is about Raven (blog)

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Richard

Tue 13th May 2014 12:16

I like this a lot )

Comment is about Raven (blog)

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Linda Cosgriff

Tue 13th May 2014 11:43

Hi Dorinda.

I don't have your email address! I know you emailed me once but because I replied rather than created a new email, it mustn't have saved your address.

Lucky for me, people were saying last night how comments posted here go to our inboxes, so I had the brainwave to write here.

Email me at cosgrifflinda1@gmail.com and I'll send you the details.

Linda x

Comment is about Dorinda MacDowell (poet profile)

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dorinda macdowell

Tue 13th May 2014 07:53

Thank you, Martin, for your comments! (I wonder if you are the same Martin who attends our Stockport WOL?) Whether you are the very same, or not, thank you so much again!
Dorinda

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Graham Sherwood

Mon 12th May 2014 23:23

Hello Cos,



Welcome to Write Out Loud.



We're really looking forward to reading some of your work. I know that you will be warmly welcomed by fellow WOL-ers on the site. 
If you haven’t already added a picture to your profile please try and do so. It’s good to see what our fellow poets look like. 

Have a good browse around the site, there’s lots going on and if you have the time make some comments about the work of other poets please feel free. It’s the best way to get some constructive feedback about your own work too.


Any problems, please ask. There’s always someone who’ll get back to you. It’s a friendly place, so welcome once again.



Graham Sherwood

Comment is about Drapetomania (poet profile)

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Graham Sherwood

Mon 12th May 2014 23:21

Hello Avinash



Welcome to Write Out Loud. 



We're really looking forward to reading some of your work. I know that you will be warmly welcomed by fellow WOL-ers on the site. 
If you haven’t already added a picture to your profile please try and do so. It’s good to see what our fellow poets look like. 

Have a good browse around the site, there’s lots going on and if you have the time make some comments about the work of other poets please feel free. It’s the best way to get some constructive feedback about your own work too.


Any problems, please ask. There’s always someone who’ll get back to you. It’s a friendly place, so welcome once again.



Graham Sherwood

Comment is about Avinash Ranjan (poet profile)

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Graham Sherwood

Mon 12th May 2014 23:21

Hello Shauna



Welcome to Write Out Loud.



We're really looking forward to reading some of your work. I know that you will be warmly welcomed by fellow WOL-ers on the site. 
If you haven’t already added a picture to your profile please try and do so. It’s good to see what our fellow poets look like. 

Have a good browse around the site, there’s lots going on and if you have the time make some comments about the work of other poets please feel free. It’s the best way to get some constructive feedback about your own work too.


Any problems, please ask. There’s always someone who’ll get back to you. It’s a friendly place, so welcome once again.



Graham Sherwood

Comment is about Shauna Cornor (poet profile)

Original item by Shauna Cornor

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Graham Sherwood

Mon 12th May 2014 23:20

Hello Arran



Welcome to Write Out Loud.



We're really looking forward to reading some of your work. I know that you will be warmly welcomed by fellow WOL-ers on the site. 
If you haven’t already added a picture to your profile please try and do so. It’s good to see what our fellow poets look like. 

Have a good browse around the site, there’s lots going on and if you have the time make some comments about the work of other poets please feel free. It’s the best way to get some constructive feedback about your own work too.


Any problems, please ask. There’s always someone who’ll get back to you. It’s a friendly place, so welcome once again.



Graham Sherwood

Comment is about Arran Gowenlock (poet profile)

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Nigel Astell

Mon 12th May 2014 13:25

If unsure and very undecided
is itself a vital clue
on the theme that we
have been given to do!

Comment is about Write Out Loud at Stockport art gallery on Monday (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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M.C. Newberry

Mon 12th May 2014 12:12

This sounds like fun. With poems on the London
Underground making poetry widely available to
a travelling public, what a good idea to promote
the equivalent (of a sort) to a shopping public.
Congratulations to Waitrose for this imaginative
in-house concept.

Comment is about Check out Roger McGough's poems at Waitrose, and have a go yourself (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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Rose Casserley

Mon 12th May 2014 09:38

nice to see you back on Jean.Have you heard about painting by numbers?I tried it but all the numbers were zero's-lol! ;)

Comment is about ODE TO DYLAN (blog)

Original item by jean lucy thompson

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Rose Casserley

Mon 12th May 2014 09:23

Harry
have tried(albeit slightly)to correspond to your 'inkless'suggestion.

As for my talking (again)about eyelids-
don't you think asking a woman to stop talking about ANYTHING is asking the impossible?

Hope your 'fourth op' went well or will do so.x

Comment is about word wrestling at 2 a.m. (blog)

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jean lucy thompson

Sun 11th May 2014 23:00

yer kinda got carried away there Andy just seemed to go on and on :)

Comment is about Death's Journey (blog)

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jean lucy thompson

Sun 11th May 2014 22:52

thanx :)

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jean lucy thompson

Sun 11th May 2014 22:45

thanx solar not my painting btw :(

Comment is about ODE TO DYLAN (blog)

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Dave Bradley

Sun 11th May 2014 22:17

Hi Harry. Thanks for the wishes. The fracture occurred while walking down a public road AFTER a hill walk. I rolled my foot into one of the many potholes, heard a crack and that was that. How are you?

Comment is about Harry O`N eill (poet profile)

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Harry O'Neill

Sun 11th May 2014 22:08

Dave,
Sorry to hear about the ankle (was it the
hill walking?) Hope it gets better soon.

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

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Harry O'Neill

Sun 11th May 2014 22:05


Ged,
Like the combination of wisdom and age in the title.

Comment is about The philosopher in the antique shop (blog)

Original item by Ged Thompson/ Liverpool Poet

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Harry O'Neill

Sun 11th May 2014 22:00

Tom
A woman who has stared without blenching at the bare arses and jutting tongues of those Maori
warriors in New Zealand would never be afraid
of the innocuous stuff of Eminem.

Comment is about Eminem Ain't Amused (blog)

Original item by Tom Doolan

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Harry O'Neill

Sun 11th May 2014 21:43

Solar

A novel use of a modern metaphor about the way
thoughts need to be processed in order to make
them communicable to the `reader` (and spot on)

It had me wishing that those last five lines
had kept with the metaphor and included something about the ink running out. (seriously)

(will you stop talking about your eyelids) (:

Comment is about word wrestling at 2 a.m. (blog)

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Harry O'Neill

Sun 11th May 2014 21:04


Nice use and personification of an ancient
legend.

Was struck by the way your `foment`s` undermines
the otherwise enjoyable feel of the `revelry`.

(Should there be a full stop after `sand`?)

Comment is about Seirene (blog)

Original item by Graham Sherwood

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jan oskar hansen

Sun 11th May 2014 20:18

Thank you Harry

Comment is about sunrays dance on my bed (blog)

Original item by jan oskar hansen

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Harry O'Neill

Sun 11th May 2014 20:16


Very timely,
These guys could menace the very
existence of free expression internet if some way of identifying them is not found.

Like your rhyming Ian (because it points it and
`authorises` it more.)

Comment is about Under The Bridge (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

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Harry O'Neill

Sun 11th May 2014 20:09


More personally serious than your usual ones
Jan. A nice account of waking to the sun-rayed
ordinary...(damn this deep poetry!)

Comment is about sunrays dance on my bed (blog)

Original item by jan oskar hansen

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Tommy Carroll

Sun 11th May 2014 18:15

interesting

Comment is about Poem of the Month! (blog)

Original item by Jane Holland

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Ian Whiteley

Sun 11th May 2014 11:11

thanks for the comment on 'digital clock blues' Dave - I like to try my new ones out at the Tudor - gives me an idea whether they're worth using in longer sets. Like your 'woman of Hoy' one - thought it was well put together. hope the ankle's healing nicely ;-)suffering for your art ;-)

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

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Ian Whiteley

Sun 11th May 2014 11:06

Harry
thanks for the comment on 'digital clock blues' - yes the rhyme helps in a blues number doesn't it? I hope you're keeping well and have avoided any more stage diving ;-)

Comment is about Harry O`N eill (poet profile)

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Ian Whiteley

Sun 11th May 2014 10:59

Jeff
thanks for commenting on 'digital clock blues' yes - I guess we've both been there and thankfully learned the lesson - it was cathartic to write

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

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Ian Whiteley

Sun 11th May 2014 10:57

Tomas
thanks for your kind comments regarding 'grandchildren of the somme' and apologies for taking so long to reply - I'm finding I'm spending less time on WOL than I used to - but that's a kinda good thing because I'm out performing more :-) I need to find a better balance between writing/performing I think. this poem is part of a wider work I'm recording with musical backings to commemorate the great war - it will include a lot of different pieces, but really glad to have obtained permission from the Wilfred Owen society to use a couple of the great mans works in the piece - so watch this space if you like war poetry. thanks once again for commenting - regards - Ian

Comment is about Tomás Ó Cárthaigh (poet profile)

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Ian Whiteley

Sun 11th May 2014 10:53

Karen
I'm so sorry for not responding sooner -0 thank you so much for your kind comments regarding 'the terrible lizard' - just a reflection on my gradual regression into 'dinosaur' status :-)looking forward to reading more of your stuff - thanks again - Ian

Comment is about Karen Deeks (poet profile)

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Ian Whiteley

Sun 11th May 2014 10:51

Cynthia
apologies for late reply - no problem regarding the Waterside - although it would have been good to see you again :-) it was a good night - Jeff Dawson was also on as a guest and we tend to compliment each other quite well. I also enjoyed all the open mic readings and the venue itself. it's one I will definitely be going back to soon, so hope to see you then

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Ian Whiteley

Sun 11th May 2014 10:48

cheers Dominic - just went back to the thread and had a read of your favourites - interesting and varied - I'm afraid most of mine are either punk/new wave poets or war poets - I don't go for most of that romanticism stuff. I've come to Heaney late - but like him - some of the others are just 1970's/1980's poets that I've stumbled across since school. an interesting topic

Comment is about Dominic James (poet profile)

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Dominic James

Sun 11th May 2014 10:33

hi Ian
interesting poetry choice for the Desert Island, I didn't know Heaney's The Forge. Reminded me of an old favourite of his that I might have included:

Whitby-sur-Moyala

Caedmon too I was lucky to have known,
Back in situ there with his full bucket
And armfuls of clean straw, the perfect yardman,
Unabsorbed in what he had to do
But doing it perfectly, and watching you.
He had worked his angel stint. He was hard as nails
And all that time he’d been poeting with the harp
His real gift was the big ignorant roar
He could still let out of him, just bogging in
As if the sacred subjects were a herd
That had broken out and needed rounding up.
I never saw him once with his hands joined
Unless it was a case of eyes to heaven
And the quick sniff and test of fingertips
After he’d passed them through a sick beast’s water.
Oh, Caedmon was the real thing all right.

Comment is about Ian Whiteley (poet profile)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

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