3 tin rings
by Rachel Bond
Three tin rings wound round the other
Fell in a chain tin tings together
Ching ching the bling bill got bigger
And I tink you teefed it like a little tinker’s nigger
You hid it in your pocket
Lifted it with thin fingers
Spindled round a hypo
Swiftly mingled blood and hydro
Till im throwin in your jeans
Minging stink into the laundrette dryer
And chink chink needle's lying on th...
Fell in a chain tin tings together
Ching ching the bling bill got bigger
And I tink you teefed it like a little tinker’s nigger
You hid it in your pocket
Lifted it with thin fingers
Spindled round a hypo
Swiftly mingled blood and hydro
Till im throwin in your jeans
Minging stink into the laundrette dryer
And chink chink needle's lying on th...
Read more and leave comments (11)
Tuesday 10th April 2012 2:03 am
Tags: nonsense comp
Kushagarnie
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Kushagarnie
Chorus
Kushagarnie, kushagarnie
Baby on your mother’s knee
Kushagarnie, kushagarnie
Eating marmalade for tea.
Buy a rainbow for a penny
Tie it to a tumtum tree.
April showers for pretty flowers
Give them marmalade for tea.
Wrap the wind up in a wigwam
Till it blows a melody
Children dancing, horses prancing
After marmalade for tea.
Find a snowman cold and shiv...
Chorus
Kushagarnie, kushagarnie
Baby on your mother’s knee
Kushagarnie, kushagarnie
Eating marmalade for tea.
Buy a rainbow for a penny
Tie it to a tumtum tree.
April showers for pretty flowers
Give them marmalade for tea.
Wrap the wind up in a wigwam
Till it blows a melody
Children dancing, horses prancing
After marmalade for tea.
Find a snowman cold and shiv...
Read more and leave comments (3)
Friday 6th April 2012 11:39 am
Tags: nonsense comp
Space Knits
by Nick Clifton
A whole lot of guff must be gruntled
Before Pearlit and Dropstitch’s moon trip,
So they knitted away with nothing to say
Then danced with a portly matchstick.
But Pearlit was really, never that sort,
His eyes preferred full-flavoured cheese,
He’d spend the weekends at the space port
But in photos he’d stand on his knees.
The gates were all locked and guard a bit thi...
Before Pearlit and Dropstitch’s moon trip,
So they knitted away with nothing to say
Then danced with a portly matchstick.
But Pearlit was really, never that sort,
His eyes preferred full-flavoured cheese,
He’d spend the weekends at the space port
But in photos he’d stand on his knees.
The gates were all locked and guard a bit thi...
Read more and leave comments (7)
Thursday 29th March 2012 7:35 am
Tags: nonsense comp
"KRUNF!" Says The Fnurk
by Lynn Dye
In the land of Scroodleflump, nothing works how you think.
Gruddles live in bongalodes, grass is the brightest pink.
Gruddles are slith and lanky, covered in purple fur,
Their bongalodes wood-built, when they’re sad they purr.
Mr. and Mrs. Gruddle are most stranculiar.
They scrunge and gruff about, their sproglet is Tulia.
Tulia has a stropple in the muddle of the floor,
Mum is ha...
Gruddles live in bongalodes, grass is the brightest pink.
Gruddles are slith and lanky, covered in purple fur,
Their bongalodes wood-built, when they’re sad they purr.
Mr. and Mrs. Gruddle are most stranculiar.
They scrunge and gruff about, their sproglet is Tulia.
Tulia has a stropple in the muddle of the floor,
Mum is ha...
Read more and leave comments (6)
Wednesday 28th March 2012 3:13 pm
Tags: nonsense comp
The wind of the wivering woggeldy woo
When the wind of the wivering woggeldy woo
came prowling the village of Kamchatkaroo,
it wiggled and sniggled and squeezed its way through,
and the whispers it glummoxed were steely and blue,
in the silve of the salvering sun,
by the silve of the salvering sun.
It ricked and it rocked and it renneled around,
the houses all filled with inquantible sound,
as it cunningly runnily snu...
came prowling the village of Kamchatkaroo,
it wiggled and sniggled and squeezed its way through,
and the whispers it glummoxed were steely and blue,
in the silve of the salvering sun,
by the silve of the salvering sun.
It ricked and it rocked and it renneled around,
the houses all filled with inquantible sound,
as it cunningly runnily snu...
Read more and leave comments (3)
Sunday 25th March 2012 4:22 pm
Tags: nonsense comp
Haven't you got one of those?
"Haven't you got one of these?" they said,
Haven't you got one of those?
It's pixelbyte loaded and glows at the seams,
It's powered outrightly by unicorns' dreams,
It's carbonicatic and kind to the trees,
It's helpful and friendly and eager to please,
"Haven't you got one of these?" they said,
Haven't you got one of those?
It&...
Haven't you got one of those?
It's pixelbyte loaded and glows at the seams,
It's powered outrightly by unicorns' dreams,
It's carbonicatic and kind to the trees,
It's helpful and friendly and eager to please,
"Haven't you got one of these?" they said,
Haven't you got one of those?
It&...
Read more and leave comments (1)
Sunday 25th March 2012 4:14 pm
Tags: nonsense comp
The Eftymoo
by Nick Clifton
The Eftymoo is private, quite a jingtish thing,
In the early of the morning or the late of the night,
Your hearing could be shattered when the Eftymoo sing,
Their pandemous crooning really is a fright.
Exopting their tune with some nerve-wrenching Grrräääcks!
‘cos only an E’moo mum could wurg an E’moo’s voice,
The non-moos are leaving in singles and...
In the early of the morning or the late of the night,
Your hearing could be shattered when the Eftymoo sing,
Their pandemous crooning really is a fright.
Exopting their tune with some nerve-wrenching Grrräääcks!
‘cos only an E’moo mum could wurg an E’moo’s voice,
The non-moos are leaving in singles and...
Read more and leave comments (5)
Sunday 18th March 2012 11:11 am
Tags: nonsense comp
The Agropuss
I thought I saw an Agropuss when I was out one day
The morning it was moisty as the clouds all surfed away
But it was not an Agropuss that caught my skandric eye:
A Blunderhound had chanced upon my path and loundly cried...
“Who dares to trip, this moisty morn, upon this field of mine?
I must insist – ‘No Tresspassers’” Did you not see the sign?
His jaungree...
The morning it was moisty as the clouds all surfed away
But it was not an Agropuss that caught my skandric eye:
A Blunderhound had chanced upon my path and loundly cried...
“Who dares to trip, this moisty morn, upon this field of mine?
I must insist – ‘No Tresspassers’” Did you not see the sign?
His jaungree...
Read more and leave comments (4)
Saturday 17th March 2012 10:46 pm
Tags: nonsense comp
HOT STUFF
The Harum-Scarum and the Lickety-Split
Were hot stuff fast, no doubt of it!
In a land of legendary creatures,
Their speed burned through its fabled features.
Around the country each was spied
Leaving scorch marks far and wide.
Though often invited out for dinner,
Neither got fatter...only thinner.
Until some soul was heard to say
"Those fellows just might fade away.
Instead of...
Were hot stuff fast, no doubt of it!
In a land of legendary creatures,
Their speed burned through its fabled features.
Around the country each was spied
Leaving scorch marks far and wide.
Though often invited out for dinner,
Neither got fatter...only thinner.
Until some soul was heard to say
"Those fellows just might fade away.
Instead of...
Read more and leave comments (2)
Saturday 17th March 2012 3:34 pm
Tags: nonsense comp
The Glopsnork
by Lynn Dye
Mollie was a brilly girl,
She got a starky fright
When she met the glopsnork
One moony twankled night.
Did it really chancey do?
Or did it dreamy blur?
Mayhaps she was transpuddled
To a beachy sclur.
He stood uplong on three legs,
Sporting a whishy tail,
Droopy ears and a huge nose,
A grin that couldn't fail.
“Jello girlie,” he chuffled.
“Don’t be s...
She got a starky fright
When she met the glopsnork
One moony twankled night.
Did it really chancey do?
Or did it dreamy blur?
Mayhaps she was transpuddled
To a beachy sclur.
He stood uplong on three legs,
Sporting a whishy tail,
Droopy ears and a huge nose,
A grin that couldn't fail.
“Jello girlie,” he chuffled.
“Don’t be s...
Read more and leave comments (10)
Saturday 17th March 2012 9:52 am
Tags: nonsense comp
SECIOHC
and so begins the tale
yad remmus enO’
a butterfly lit upon a
,detser dna rewolf
fanning its wings gently.
derrits ria ehT
waved
ezeerb a emaceb
a wind
a elag mrots a
a mighty force of
!noitcurtseD dna htaeD
Hurricane!
!noonhpyT
Cyclone!
‘yhpargoeg no gnidneped
“STOP, I say, stop this stupid story.
!ecneloiv hcum ooT !potS
Reverse. Rewind at once. &...
yad remmus enO’
a butterfly lit upon a
,detser dna rewolf
fanning its wings gently.
derrits ria ehT
waved
ezeerb a emaceb
a wind
a elag mrots a
a mighty force of
!noitcurtseD dna htaeD
Hurricane!
!noonhpyT
Cyclone!
‘yhpargoeg no gnidneped
“STOP, I say, stop this stupid story.
!ecneloiv hcum ooT !potS
Reverse. Rewind at once. &...
Read more and leave comments (9)
Friday 16th March 2012 11:44 am
Tags: nonsense comp
Wot I did at Night School
by John Embley
Slim Slam Snigger Snogger
Nif naf noo
Ack gack piddle poddle
Bink Pleen Grue
======
this here’s an pome,
o can’t you see,
an pome wot woz
writ by me.
it should’ve been
an flowerpot,
but that is clearly
wot it’s not.
my spelling tests
I didn’t pass ---
I thought the sign said
‘pottery class’...
Nif naf noo
Ack gack piddle poddle
Bink Pleen Grue
======
this here’s an pome,
o can’t you see,
an pome wot woz
writ by me.
it should’ve been
an flowerpot,
but that is clearly
wot it’s not.
my spelling tests
I didn’t pass ---
I thought the sign said
‘pottery class’...
Read more and leave comments (3)
Thursday 15th March 2012 9:42 pm
Tags: nonsense comp
Flippity Floppety Flump (Competition)
Flippity Floppety Flump-
The Cow jumped over the moon-
and landed with a heck of a thumpety thump-
thumpety thump...thumpety thump...thumpety thump!
The Cow said ' what is this swelling on my head'-
the cat replied it's a ' Flippity Floppety Flumpety Bump'-
you see with the gravitational pull of our planet Earth-
the spoon hit you at great speed, you are lucky not to b...
The Cow jumped over the moon-
and landed with a heck of a thumpety thump-
thumpety thump...thumpety thump...thumpety thump!
The Cow said ' what is this swelling on my head'-
the cat replied it's a ' Flippity Floppety Flumpety Bump'-
you see with the gravitational pull of our planet Earth-
the spoon hit you at great speed, you are lucky not to b...
Read more and leave comments (4)
Tuesday 13th March 2012 10:31 pm
Tags: Nonsense Comp
Tickling Fish
by Laura
Once upon a time in Alongalongalo
I was taught to tickle fish by an old Eskimo
I will tell the trick to you, if you howl “Bomballoo!”
all the way to Timbuktu, in reverse
To tickle Koi one must learn to speak in Mayonnaise
Goldfish should be chundered to in Carrotalian
Skate enjoy a skithering along their spineytines
Whereas Tuna like their tozies chuckatetting
Carp and...
I was taught to tickle fish by an old Eskimo
I will tell the trick to you, if you howl “Bomballoo!”
all the way to Timbuktu, in reverse
To tickle Koi one must learn to speak in Mayonnaise
Goldfish should be chundered to in Carrotalian
Skate enjoy a skithering along their spineytines
Whereas Tuna like their tozies chuckatetting
Carp and...
Read more and leave comments (12)
Monday 12th March 2012 2:03 pm
Tags: nonsense comp
What Is A Goit? WOL Comp / Nonsense Verse
by John Duffus
What Is A Goit?
For what is a Goit if not it be black?
A Goit is a Goit and that is that
As black as a crow, as black as a cat
A Goit is an enchanted artifact
A Goit may be skinny, a Goit may be fat
It may raise itself up or squash itself flat
Sometimes bareheaded, more oft in a hat
Its hair is well-beaded and fashioned in plats
Should ever a Goit of differing hue
Appe...
For what is a Goit if not it be black?
A Goit is a Goit and that is that
As black as a crow, as black as a cat
A Goit is an enchanted artifact
A Goit may be skinny, a Goit may be fat
It may raise itself up or squash itself flat
Sometimes bareheaded, more oft in a hat
Its hair is well-beaded and fashioned in plats
Should ever a Goit of differing hue
Appe...
Read more and leave comments (5)
Sunday 11th March 2012 11:06 am
Tags: nonsense comp
When Neptune Filled His Boots (Nonsense)
by Gus Jonsson
When Bibble he would a bounding swim
Boundless glore upon his fizzog
Splashed he breastie ways and overlimb
Swimming swifty like a croc log
Quiet stealth he’d swimmy creep
Both overland and overseas
Until upon toasted stooks he’d leap
Climbed the highest Groolam trees
Came then Krabb and turning Turtle
Came then coughing Doobah birds
Nurbling yams and wee ferky Furtles
All w...
Boundless glore upon his fizzog
Splashed he breastie ways and overlimb
Swimming swifty like a croc log
Quiet stealth he’d swimmy creep
Both overland and overseas
Until upon toasted stooks he’d leap
Climbed the highest Groolam trees
Came then Krabb and turning Turtle
Came then coughing Doobah birds
Nurbling yams and wee ferky Furtles
All w...
Read more and leave comments (5)
Saturday 10th March 2012 8:36 pm
Tags: nonsense comp
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